commodity queen

i was there 3000 years ago, i remember when they promised minnesota to the somalis. we passed around caribou coffee when the manifesto was signed, it was beautiful.

omg we're gonna get ozempic for cats before GTA 6*

*universal healthcare

the concept of me wanting to be pregnant but only when i get wine drunk

*insert cynthia erivo tapping on her beautiful head*

why is every kids movie just zootopia now

it cannot be enjoyable to be beta blocked out of your gourd all the time

i hate that politics is just draftkings now, like this week we have parlays on israel and argentina

if i had no feminist goals i bet i would make the fuck out of some buffalo chicken dip on sundays and offer more blowjobs

my new year's resolution is going to be "get attention"

christmas wish list:
- complete overhaul of my winter skin care system
- psychic visit
- at least one (1) state pass universal healthcare by end of 2026
- house plant
- $50,000

asking someone "are you a glinda or are you an elphaba?" is just asking "are you a girlie girl🌸🎀👛🦩🐷🩰? or are you an enemy of the state?⚠️☣️🧨🗡️⚰️💣🩸☠️"

today is one of those days when you're like, i actually don't wanna know if my parents are informed about the biggest news

Nancy Mace, hold your ground on the Epstein files and you'll be reincarnated as a real girl

the craziest part about the president raping little girls is that i still have to go to work knowing that information

I feel like I may never feel again what this campaign made me feel. I hope I'm wrong.

Lex is legitimately one of the best leaders in impactful journalism of our generation. This is so disheartening.

me when a girl or gay guy has a deeply disgusting out of touch offensive costume idea

Would y’all believe, that the NY bill to establish universal healthcare was passed in the assembly and has been in the state senate health committee for 10 months despite democrats having 40 out of 63 seats ?????

got snaps, buttons, zipper, and a belt, call that dual authenticating my pants

i love how halloween movies are everything paranormal, everything psychological, everything downright ooky spooky, and also anything vaguely gay

when i see andrew schulz i get so scared bc that's evil matteo lane

Trump and the right are having to make AI slop to respond to this No Kings movement from the left and the center. They are responding to the movement, and are very clearly losing. Whomever initiates the rhetoric controls the public opinion.

You can tell who is winning the rhetoric war based on who is originating ideas and who is responding. During the initial release of MAGA, libs tried Making America Smart Again, Gay Again, Kind Again...all working within Trump's rhetoric. Clearly losing. But now,

fall needs to have at least 6 more weeks what do you mean I need to celebrate the birthday of everyone alive and also buy thoughtful christmas gifts while being full of creative whimsy

cold press juicing and watching real housewives of salt lake city, call that feeding the body, rotting the mind

they're already claiming that a leftist did it. why? did charlie do anything to make leftists and their communities hate him?

I'm so sick of this work shit i came to new york to be goofy

WAR IS OVER

i knew i loved a bad boy when i first heard about peter rabbit.

some of the most bushwick behavior is actually happening in bedstuy

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