I’ve already seen multiple Louvre jewel robber costumes - I bet those thieves had no idea they’d also be stealing our hearts

Kids these days with their 6-7.
When I was a kid we had 8-6-7-5-3-0-9.

Comics doing crowdwork at open mics is like if strippers solicited other strippers for lap dances

Bars/Venues with black lights or specific colored lighting in your bathroom (ex: purple lighting), please stop! I can’t tell if I’m done wiping or if I need to go to the hospital

Alright, I’ll settle gorilla vs 100 men

The 100 men v gorilla debate is becoming so heated I’m concerned someone’s gonna make it happen

If Saquon does that backwards hurdle move over Trump I’ll forgive him

Weaning myself off the dating apps to meet people the old fashioned way - waiting for them to get divorced

There’s gotta be at least one guy who is only interested in Big Foot because of a a foot fetish

Is there the way to tell the algorithm I bought a product and it can stop showing me ads for it?

What’s happening on the internet this week? Oh, middle aged men who call people snowflakes are upset about the latest Disney princess movie? Cool

I have health insurance so why does every doctor visit feel like the worst financial decision I’ve ever made?

Can I watch the Oscars if I haven’t seen 97 movies?

Stop calling people snowflakes if you’re too scared to ride Septa

Bar rescue but Jon Taffer just shows up and cancels open mic night

Waiting for the Trump administration to take a stand on transition lenses

Why isn’t the assistant manager called a mini boss?

Whoa! The same people who were mad about the halftime show are now mad the eagles don’t want to go to the White House? That’s so weird

Just joined! Needed a new echo chamber in my life