Kevin Allman's Avatar

Kevin Allman

@kevinallman.bsky.social

I’ll be posting soon. Jokes and journalism. Slow-walking over here. #nolatwitter

967 Followers  |  521 Following  |  1,732 Posts  |  Joined: 24.09.2023
Posts Following

Posts by Kevin Allman (@kevinallman.bsky.social)

Calling himself “Leader” Schumer is the rancid cherry on the shit sundae

01.03.2026 02:19 — 👍 4    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Maybe if we just keep arresting him every couple of days he’ll move back and infest Brentwood or whatnot

01.03.2026 02:15 — 👍 2    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

She fell off an ATV.

Totally normal medical care for a young woman who “fell off an ATV.”

28.02.2026 23:21 — 👍 2    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
Post image

“Big gay people are scary to me” — Shia LeBoeuf

28.02.2026 22:48 — 👍 2    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 1

Winston Smith making revisions at the Ministry of Peace as we speak

28.02.2026 22:35 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Tired: Operation Enduring Freedom

Wired: Operation Epic Fury, It’s Epic, Dude

28.02.2026 21:40 — 👍 2    🔁 1    💬 0    📌 0

If you didn’t see this when it went flying around yesterday it’s well worth the two minutes.

28.02.2026 21:07 — 👍 5    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Congratulations!

27.02.2026 22:49 — 👍 1    🔁 1    💬 1    📌 0

Was not aware Charles Nelson Reilly was a member of the Daughters of the American Revolution

27.02.2026 22:40 — 👍 6    🔁 3    💬 0    📌 0

“Speaking of E, my daddy taught me that in England it’s ‘shite’.”

27.02.2026 22:21 — 👍 2    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

It’s like an Amy Poehler character

27.02.2026 02:28 — 👍 3    🔁 1    💬 1    📌 0

Brandy attached herself to emotionally unavailable men.

Only she could break the pattern. But she was too busy laying whiskey down.

26.02.2026 23:30 — 👍 3    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Keep pushing as long as you have something to say and enjoy saying it.

Decoupling my identity from my job took a couple of years (not saying you should do that!).

26.02.2026 23:28 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

It was for me!

26.02.2026 23:21 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

Dunno. Hannibal Hamlin had some rizz to him

26.02.2026 23:17 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Oh good LORD. These are some attention- (and donation-) thirsty Boudreauxs

26.02.2026 23:15 — 👍 4    🔁 1    💬 1    📌 0

“Kevin, why are you still single?”

(Kevin tamps his pipe, blows a thoughtful smoke ring ceilingward)

“Because my life, my love, and my lady … is the sea”

26.02.2026 22:29 — 👍 7    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

“For my next trick, I will make the entirety of The New York Times opinion writers disappear. For good”

I would hoist him on my shoulders myself

26.02.2026 22:04 — 👍 1    🔁 1    💬 0    📌 0

As one who walked backwards for three blocks yelling questions at Ray Nagin after his conviction, I agree. This is drug court.

26.02.2026 21:45 — 👍 5    🔁 1    💬 0    📌 0

Just more centrally located. I won’t have a car.

26.02.2026 18:15 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 2    📌 0

Dang, trying to find a hotel in New Orleans for mid-March and bargains do not exist.

In contrast I got a 4.5* hotel in the Loop in Chicago for $147 a night.

26.02.2026 00:10 — 👍 5    🔁 1    💬 1    📌 0

It wouldn’t be his most awful collaboration. There are a lot of ties for first with old Devadip

25.02.2026 23:26 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

I thought for a hot second that was Kathy Bates in Misery

25.02.2026 22:13 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

I used to laugh at the DVDs sold from parking lots in NOE where they just taped ‘em in the theater and you could see the silhouettes of people going for popcorn

25.02.2026 21:45 — 👍 1    🔁 1    💬 0    📌 0

Is “dwell on this” the new “let that sink in”?

25.02.2026 21:32 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

You other crawfish can just DIE

25.02.2026 21:27 — 👍 5    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

Bernie Mac is on Netflix. The early episodes with Larry Wilmore writing are just as good as they ever were, if not better.

24.02.2026 23:48 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

One of the women offered Fletcher the chance to try on her medal and he was excited.

Unlike this, it was human and charming and warm

24.02.2026 23:45 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

It is??? I have Prime.

24.02.2026 23:41 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

“Who’ll stop the rain”

“Have you ever seen the rain”

You have a lot of questions about the rain, John Fogerty

24.02.2026 23:23 — 👍 3    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0