Kevin Allman

Could be! Tho Bob had a baby with every woman in Jamaica so …

“No woman no cry”

STOP EMOTION POLICING YOUR WIFE, BOB

After reading the umpteenth article about strangers asking to swap assigned seats on a flight, I’ve devised a strategy: if someone tries that shiz with me I’m going to say — very loudly — “I GET MY KICKS ABOVE THE WAISTLINE, SUNSHINE”

… in a Fred Schneider voice

If ICE came in and hauled away these oblivious privileged white women I’d buy the thugs a drink and send them Edible Arrangements

Shoutout to the three gals out for an afternoon beer who are catching up with a fourth there over FaceTime with the volume at 11 SHOUTING over the juke.

Calling himself “Leader” Schumer is the rancid cherry on the shit sundae

Maybe if we just keep arresting him every couple of days he’ll move back and infest Brentwood or whatnot

She fell off an ATV.

Totally normal medical care for a young woman who “fell off an ATV.”

“Big gay people are scary to me” — Shia LeBoeuf

Winston Smith making revisions at the Ministry of Peace as we speak

Tired: Operation Enduring Freedom

Wired: Operation Epic Fury, It’s Epic, Dude

If you didn’t see this when it went flying around yesterday it’s well worth the two minutes.

Congratulations!

Was not aware Charles Nelson Reilly was a member of the Daughters of the American Revolution

“Speaking of E, my daddy taught me that in England it’s ‘shite’.”

It’s like an Amy Poehler character

Brandy attached herself to emotionally unavailable men.

Only she could break the pattern. But she was too busy laying whiskey down.

Keep pushing as long as you have something to say and enjoy saying it.

Decoupling my identity from my job took a couple of years (not saying you should do that!).

It was for me!

Dunno. Hannibal Hamlin had some rizz to him

Oh good LORD. These are some attention- (and donation-) thirsty Boudreauxs

“Kevin, why are you still single?”

(Kevin tamps his pipe, blows a thoughtful smoke ring ceilingward)

“Because my life, my love, and my lady … is the sea”

“For my next trick, I will make the entirety of The New York Times opinion writers disappear. For good”

I would hoist him on my shoulders myself

As one who walked backwards for three blocks yelling questions at Ray Nagin after his conviction, I agree. This is drug court.

Just more centrally located. I won’t have a car.

Dang, trying to find a hotel in New Orleans for mid-March and bargains do not exist.

In contrast I got a 4.5* hotel in the Loop in Chicago for $147 a night.

It wouldn’t be his most awful collaboration. There are a lot of ties for first with old Devadip

I thought for a hot second that was Kathy Bates in Misery

I used to laugh at the DVDs sold from parking lots in NOE where they just taped ‘em in the theater and you could see the silhouettes of people going for popcorn

Is “dwell on this” the new “let that sink in”?