Steve Morgan

Slightly better than doing a shit, I suppose.

YouTube video by NextUp Comedy Bill Hicks On The Weirdest Question Ever | Next Up Comedy

Bill Hicks always had a routine for these kind of eventualities.

youtu.be/NivJKUfa7Sw

That'll be some half-time dressing-room scene

Soundbites for the circle berks.

Viddy well

I thought so too. I hope it was Quentin Crisp, I'm pretty sure it was. It always amazes me that people feel confident enough to dissect other people's looks in public, not least when a mirror often seems as much of a stranger to them as decent manners.

I remember reading - I think it was Quentin Crisp - reminiscing about being stopped in the street by someone who said: 'My, you've got it all on today' - which seems nicely quaint.

Top Tip from Viz: Daily Express editors. Test your readers’ memory by constantly filling your paper with inflammatory articles about asylum seekers and immigrants and then feigning disgust when the BNP get elected.

Was thumbing an old Viz annual earlier. Their advice to the Express is still being followed, I see. Just substitute Reform for the BNP.

Even more impressively, Lazarus came back from the dead

Almost my favourite of his - he really spits those vocals out on the early rush, doesn’t he?
And such a crunchy tight band.

The intention is always ‘I’m a swell, cool guy’ but in my experience it is usually bad news, or brews in this instance. They look okay on real dogs, though.

Bandanas fill me with a creeping dread

And never forget Boycott's insane one-day 146 back in the 1965 Gillette Cup (I'm sure he hasn't)

A healthy and mixed diet is good. Test cricket still rules for me.

Insane. 33-ball ton

That was carnage

Probably not

Playing the long (trousers) game

Yes, it wasn’t my go-to sound either, but they were interesting. Really liked Monster In the House. It was a real age of men in bands in shorts and drum machines.

Blimey, there's a name I haven't heard in a while. We supported them at the Leadmill in Sheffield a gazillion years ago. Think Grossing 10K had just come out (which was worth a lot more then than it is now...)

Apology unnecessary. What a collection of ghouls haunt us daily.

Like a fine wine, a man who improves with age. I've lost count of how many times I have seen him now. Must be closing in on three figures...

Damn. Only three hours late with this joke

Cyrpus to requirements

YouTube video by Sean Carslake The Tree Burning Scene from 'Rollerball' (1975).

Some good themes in there - the action sequences hold up brilliantly too, I thought when I watched it again. This bit really left a lot on me as well, the sheer inanity...

www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmdC...

Reform remind me of nothing so much as the kids at school who expected you to believe massive whoppers about their dads being in the SAS

I do think the harder you try, the harder it can get. I've done it a few times in 2 - and freakishly in one once, but I've had so many close calls where I've just made it.

Yes, one of the best and simplest pleasures going, I'd say.

Looking forward to seeing Top of the Slops, a pop round-up of all the AI-generated choons, fronted by a CGI David 'The Kid' Jensen

Did you walk out of the trailer?