Judson

I mean, why would they lie about something so inconsequential in the grand scheme of things?

*holds hand to nonexistent earpiece*

And I'm being told that's the dumbest thing I've ever asked.

Desperately need the high school concession stand to start selling beer.

Same!

[no-it-never-works-for-those-people-but-it-might-work-for-us.gif]

I’ll try and stay awake.

Legit don't know why she thought she stood a chance.

<Insert Torment Nexus meme>

These guys have never learned a single moral from any story ever.

Losing someone is awful. Trying to pretend that you haven't would be so much worse.

It looks like the fork version of true Grail from Indiana Jones, coarse, rough-hewn, unpleasant on the tongue.

Brought to us by the "Pro-Life" people.

There is no context in which the shortening of a "kill chain" is a net positive.

The cynical side of me thinks he's trying to pull a 'Miracle on 34th Street' by recommending supporting other outlets and hoping for an outpouring of goodwill for his own in return...

I assume we are all 5 or 7, but want to be 9.

This timeline sucks. At no point should I *ever* be forced to agree with Matt Walsh.

A big general, a strong general, tears in his eyes, came up to me and said, "Mr. President, you have to stop Iran from getting the nukes we already had a deal to prevent that you backed out of before you obliterated their nukes and now they'll have nukes by like, next week!"

No one knew how complicated geopolitical conflict could be.

ACAB undersells how irredeemable some of these people are.

My first instinct was shingles, but I've got 'Sleeper agent on US Hockey Team poisoned the gold medal before they let him try it on' as a dark horse option.

And before anyone asks, the extreme position on this side of the issue would be taking off and nuking these sites from orbit, obviously.

The moderate position.

Eternally two weeks away, just like healthcare and infrastructure and...

I don't understand how it gets better every time I watch it, but it does.

He's seen it, and his son is currently having to take away his phone due a "moral failing" after he heard the news.

Or what a bunch of guys who never emotionally matured past 12 and need to take out their impotent rage on people who could never retaliate against them directly might come up with.

Graham incapable of even considering the "Are we the baddies?" meme.

If there were any justice in the world, their restless ghosts would slaughter thousands until we appeased them with the appropriate offering, preferably on some sort of platter, maybe silver.

It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

US-Israeli strike on girls' school kills at least 85 students, Iran's judiciary says At least 85 students have been killed in US-Israeli strikes that hit an Iranian girls' school in Hormozgan province, Iran's judiciary said on Saturday. Washington has not commented on the reported str...

We killed 85 schoolgirls. We are not the good guys.

things every single republican president of your lifetime has done

- started a war in the middle east
- completely destroyed the economy