divi ♪

what will it take for mal to cut himself lets see

stood in the shower and scream cried for 15 minutes

yes because shoving more antidepressants down my throat will just help EVERYTHING

my dad doesn’t care about me i have no clue who he even is i know nothing about him hes just there and my mom bounces between feigning sympathy for me and condemning me for everything and calling for more meds when i freak out at her

cried while making toast because i realized my parents dont treat me like their child (i have known this for years)

HES NEVER GONNA LEAVE ME RIGHT

my friend just isn't talking to anyone and it feels like a personal attack (everything does)

nooo, don't worry about it
intrusive thoughts just get to me fast, i'm not in danger

the concept of me wanting to jump to suicide when the smallest inconvenience happens

my hb is ignoring me what if i killed myself

i have nooo idea what im talking about

lowkey fits into my philosophy i wholly believe the lowest someone can be is sitting in how tragic life is but i want so much more than i'm given i want someone to look at me and know that the intensity behind my eyes is sincere and desperate

THE BIGGEST TRAGEDY OF MY LIFE IS THAT I WILL BE LIMITED FOREVER nothing no one no place can ever depict the depth of how i feel and how deep desire is fused into my bones there is no grandiose act that can prove to others how i feel or who i am

no matter what i will always want to live so bad. i love living. i love everything living gives me. i love crying. i love smiling. i love bleeding. i love throwing up. i love laughing. i love myself. i love other people. i love every opportunity to come. i love present reality.

i'm 15 years old and uhm i'm dying !!

you are all figments of my imagination it is okay 🥳

at least my head makes me happier but i really panic when i suddenly am made aware of my distortions

nothing feels real ever, today i was in a gas station and i randomly realized how far away everything feels and that i have zero connection to my body

- technically accurate

^ this but also situations arent objectively measurable, say a dead man's situation is worse than an alive man's, but it's ultimately a matter of perspective and bias

i can say that no matter what i endure rin has a harsher life than i do or he can say the same about me and both are -

okay the worst part about last year undoubtedly was my tiredness lmfao passing out during GYM WE GET IT YOU ARE TIRED BOY

its like that one audio im (15) years old and... im dying!!

the life of a problematic mentally ill child
all he did was send me a screenshot of an email. i am terrified of my father

remembering when my dad texted me in school and i panicked so bad i started screaming and crying in my counselors office and threw up

i don’t even like saying mom and dad anymore

when i was about to be sent to the hospital screaming at my mother because i thought everyone around me was trying to #kill me ✌️

i consent to this

kay why ess

girl no one gaf. kill yourself

every time i think about it it’s that scathing “get closer, get closer” noise