When I sold weed I thought of the cost of things based off how many grams I’d have to sell to afford them
When I fucked people for money I thought in terms of how many dicks I’d have to take
Now that I have an office job I think about it in terms of how many hours of suicidal ideation are required
04.05.2025 00:41 —
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Tgirls were invented by Pioneer to sell more CDJs
30.04.2025 00:49 —
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I refuse to watch porn with dubstep in it
29.04.2025 18:30 —
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I’d rather get broken up with than lose a stuffie
28.04.2025 23:17 —
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I literally just nut in her and she asks me “Have you ever read The Faggots & Their Friends Between Revolutions”
22.04.2025 14:21 —
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I’d date a woman that doesn’t watch porn but I’d never date a man that doesn’t
18.04.2025 04:53 —
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Resisting the urge to cruise the dolls in the queer clinic waiting room
17.04.2025 17:45 —
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I’m only eating Reese’s peanut butter Easter eggs today 🤷♀️
03.04.2025 23:35 —
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le*
28.03.2025 04:45 —
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Seems sus but okkkk
27.03.2025 01:40 —
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A downside to eating less/being healthier is you don’t get to take as many shits that make you feel like a whole new person
26.03.2025 22:15 —
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I couch understanding in colloquialism, snark, jokes, and asides
25.03.2025 07:13 —
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The best part of transitioning is people finally wanna drug me
25.03.2025 00:50 —
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You don’t need a squatty potty if your heels are high enough
19.03.2025 00:56 —
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At least the OG Nazis manufactured high quality drugs
14.03.2025 18:58 —
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13.03.2025 22:58 —
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Tgirls that are plural or therians turning their noses up at tgirls that are sissies - bonkers
13.03.2025 05:06 —
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I will live long enough to see the 21 vape salute at Elon’s funeral.
13.03.2025 03:45 —
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Top Gear adjacent content has just gotten increasingly sad and lame
13.03.2025 04:32 —
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Definitely clothes in that bag and not an absurd amount of fuck toys
12.03.2025 22:17 —
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The only motivation I have to leave the house rn is b/c I want food, booze, and cocaine.
And tbh I only want the food so I can consume more booze and cocaine.
08.03.2025 02:21 —
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Accessories are important in both crime and fashion
06.03.2025 21:18 —
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I, on occasion, do put together a cute look
06.03.2025 21:18 —
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Ah the classic Texas pastime of double checking your concealed carry before taking your pup on a quick late night walk.
05.03.2025 07:26 —
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If I can just make it to 4:00 p.m. then I can finally eat breakfast 🙏
04.03.2025 20:35 —
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So so disappointed when I found out Uncut Gems wasn’t about uncircumcised tgirls
03.03.2025 17:26 —
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The dolls would never
02.03.2025 18:08 —
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JFC the whole beginning of his set has been LMFAO remixes. It’s not just one. He’s doing the whole catalog.
02.03.2025 18:06 —
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The atrocities perpetrated by the Trump administration pale in comparison to the those being committed by the DJ at the vintage market outside my work playing a deep house/dubstep remix of LMFAO’s Sexy and I Know It at 11 a.m.
02.03.2025 18:06 —
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Stone top butch vs verse fagdyke butch slut
26.02.2025 00:38 —
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