cedar longpenis

i do give her a little grace she is a boomer but like please mom just mind ur business 😭😭😭😭

he’s at the bakery !!!!!

it was honestly more awkward than evil, she dropped it pretty quickly but i was like please don’t make me explain this to you

yeah i wanna have sex while wearing it

i bought a cute wig on the family amazon account for …. reasons … and within 5 minutes my mom called me asking me if i was “having regrets”

me with my FRESHLY SHAVED HEAD wearing a maroon cropped tshirt and an oversized unbuttoned flannel with camo cargo pants sagging just below my waist so u can see my plaid boxers. u can see my neck and hand tattoo and my dangly earring.

kinda fucked up how hot i am. sorry

BUNKLE UP YOU ARE BIFFED ………

Magical fairy image that says, Magical things are everywhere... you just have to know where to look. Comments below say, Gwen Bunchy: puting thimbles of honey around helps. Brie Flonage: i dont really believe in them jus an idea. Gwen Bunchy: not believing? yet speak words of them to their backs? bunkle up. Gwen Bunchy: you are biffed.. (if you read this fairies like you)

no i don’t have a fetish for wearing wet jeans but i am fully invested in the ai created sirwetness cinematic universe

oh great i said all the magic keywords and now all the blue wave idiots are gonna flood this post missing the point

my penis can double as a sword. i invented steel toed boots but i dont have to wear them because my toes are made of steel. i am fluent in pirate AND samurai. my dad owns this tavern and i kiss my mom on the mouth

now u have to make women think you’re adorable and feel bad for you the modern way, posting pathetically online

the point is that everyone knows what needs to happen to everyone on the list already we just need some people to step up and do it already

LOL

my penis can double as a sword. i invented steel toed boots but i dont have to wear them because my toes are made of steel. i am fluent in pirate AND samurai. my dad owns this tavern and i kiss my mom on the mouth

ofc :)

i am the sole survivor of a horrific shipwreck and also the king of pen island

can’t related i’m unemployed

shoutout to whoever’s at work refreshing the feed every minute cause they’re bored as shit. this one’s for u

back in the day you could just go to the tavern and tell wenches you’re the sole survivor of a horrific shipwreck and they believed you

“google searches about the epstein files dropped 95% when trump started bombing iran” girl what is left to google??? what more do you need to know??? is someone still on the fucking fence ???

not hungover every day is a gift

LMAO

gus fring: Mr white ur gonna wanna take a look at this. they’re overriding the mainframe

walter white: Uh, in english four eyes

Jesse pinkman: they fuckin our pussies!!!

walter white: *ozymandius face*

god sometimes it’s really like that 😭😭😭😭😭

nightsky i failed u…… i forgot to drink water ……. and im paying the price

oh my god

mr white…… mr white ….. i need u to suck my bottom growth …. quickly …….

LMAO

me: ewwww why would anyone wanna see my pussy
me now that i have a big fat suckable tdick: wait a minute