Drake Tungsten

If you meet a millennial or gen z from Russia it's way easier to get them to say Moose and Squirrel because they don't know why you're doing it

I spent years working in restaurants with Spanish speakers. I don't know what Bad Bunny said but I'm pretty sure he was talking about my mother

working on a new unified theory of american reality i'm calling "everyone is twelve now"

Somebody blurred it like a Japanese porn. We are calling him President Nussy and nothing else from now on.

"So much for the tolerant left!"
I am very tolerant. For instance, if you're MAGA and refusing to take Tylenol for a dangerously high fever, I support you. Drink the raw milk, it's your God given right as an American! Diet and exercise DO cure cancer! I support you 100%

I saw this a minute ago and I think this needs to be the tactic

The strategy sure seems to be “If we just give the fascists the authoritarian nightmare state that they want, then they’ll leave us alone.”

A grim reminder: these people will never be satisfied. There’s no point at which they will say “we’ve won, let’s enjoy life.” They will always be looking for someone else to punish, to revile, to dehumanize. They’re empty without that.

I had someone try to shame me with a clip of his child running up to him. I told that person that John Wayne Gacey had children that loved him

Elizabeth Warren on people who say Dems needs to tone down their rhetoric: "Oh, please. Why don't you start with the president of the United States? And every ugly meme he's posted and every ugly word."

I'm not celebrating, nor am I sorry that it happened. He spent his entire empty life spreading misinformation and hatred and in the end it was all for nothing. He will be remembered for a few minutes until the next ghoul steps up to take his place and his life and death will be rendered meaningless

I was just about to start watching Superman for the 5th time but I just saw that Nobody 2 is available for streaming so I bought it. Watching Superman one more time before I get started

Paint every crosswalk in Florida

Many years ago I bought a bottle for my girlfriend at the time on my way home from Chicago because she really wanted to try it. We did a shot together and I hated it so so much. I just wanted the taste to go away and it kept getting worse. She actually really loved it and would sip it straight

Oh my god I knew he couldn't be trusted! GTFO with that Chicago poison!

No truer words were spoken. We have to fight fire with fire - and it might be too late, but we have to stop playing nice because we're having our asses handed to us. ENOUGH!

The Cracker Barrel meltdown is what happens when they have nothing left. They're seeing "woke" everywhere and acting like idiots. Don't engage them!

For years people said it was a gross exaggeration to label Nazism and its associated viewpoints within the modern conservative movement and especially online. Now Nazis are openly thriving and their rhetoric is impossible to avoid and many of the people who downplayed it are saying nothing at all

The Son of Man Behind An Apple Because I Can't Paint Faces For Shit (1964)

duh i'm Magritte i can't paint faces for shit duhhh

My brain fritzes out in the middle of a new bit. Come watch the ongoing collapse September 19th at The Paramount Theatre in Austin. Grab tickets here: tickets.austintheatre.org/12216/12217

I'm not big enough to have right wing goons try to troll my comment section so I'll occasionally find and block them on other comment sections

I appreciate you doing these so I don't have to read this nonsense

Does anyone find this as funny as I do? My partner has face blindness like a MF. We saw Superman in the theater. After the opening scenes they cut to Superman as Clark Kent and my partner leans over and says "who's that?"

Roger Ebert Logo Search Icon Reviews The Last Boy Scout star ratingstar rating Action 107 minutes ‧ R ‧ 1991 Roger Ebert December 13, 1991 4 min read “The Last Boy Scout” opens with a sequence of such sudden and unexpected violence that the audience is stunned into uneasy silence. The movie never looks back. Perhaps propelled by the determination of its star, Bruce Willis, to erase the box-office curse of “Hudson Hawk,” this film panders with such determination to the base instincts of the action crowd that it will, I am sure, be an enormous hit. It was produced by Joel Silver, who has made violence toward women a key element in his films, and cheerfully expands its horizons to violence toward children – providing the Willis character with a foul-mouthed 13-year-old daughter who is hauled around by bad guys with a gun pointed at her temple. (The film is rated R, proving that violence alone cannot earn the NC-17 rating.) It is some kind of a tribute to Tony Scott, who directed the film, and especially to Shane Black and Greg Hicks, who wrote the screenplay, that this material survives its own complete cynicism and somehow actually works. Watching it, I felt like some weatherbeaten innocent from an earlier, simpler time. My distaste was irrelevant. This movie is the future. It assumes the average audience now has no standards except those of the mob. The only consistent theme of the film is its hatred of women. The two heroes (Willis and Damon Wayans) have a wife and a girlfriend, respectively, who cheat on them – the wife with Willis’ best friend, the girlfriend by prostituting herself. Both men are at home in this screenplay, which hates women with a particular viciousness; the verbal violence begins by calling them bitches and whores and worse, over and over again, and the message is that a man can only really trust another man.

It is some kind of a tribute to Tony Scott, who directed the film, and especially to Shane Black and Greg Hicks, who wrote the screenplay, that this material survives its own complete cynicism and somehow actually works. Watching it, I felt like some weatherbeaten innocent from an earlier, simpler time. My distaste was irrelevant.

This movie is the future. It assumes the average audience now has no standards except those of the mob.

just rewatched The Last Boy Scout, a movie i cannot analyze objectively because i have loved it since childhood. But goddamn Ebert's review of it is both hard as fuck and prescient.

I agree that he does overuse the word but he really nails the blatant racism of that kind of guy in that generation. In RD when they're talking about the waitress who glued her boyfriend's dick to his belly I literally felt like I was listening to my racist dad and his friends.

Yes really really well

This film didn't start the rumor that a palm to the nose will kill a guy, but it confirmed it for 100% certain to 15 year old me. I wasn't disabused of this until I was in my early 30's reading a Cracked article. I did not want to be disabused

Every accusation is a confession with these people. Every. Fucking. Time