Chriss Nelson

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"Women need to lower their standards."
No, men need to be better.

Daffodils make me feel so much pressure. They come up in early spring all beautiful and I'm like NO STOP THE REST OF THE GARDEN ISN'T FINISHED YET DONT LOOK AT ME

Please vote today if you can in the special election for Lancaster county! Josh Parsons sucks.

My kiddo was playing with the neighbor and neighbor kid said "don't touch the mulch!" And I said "oh, is the floor lava?" And she said, "no, it's an infinite void!"

I've gotta get better at figuring out healthy dissociation. I know I need to be able to indulge in the things I enjoy without getting to the point that I completely separate myself from reality for long periods of time.

How can I stop taking life so fn seriously all the time? Its exhausting. Genuine question. Please help.

Today, I feel like I've mastered the art of doing chores in the room your kid is playing in

For those of you desperately in need of distraction from today's headlines, here's a photo of a bunny & a chick who are friends.

Bluesky has the like button on the right and Substack has it on the left. I wonder if there are more left-handed (right-brained) users on that platform. These are the things my web design brain thinks about.

And now my hair keeps tickling the inside of my ear and I can't focus on what I'm reading but I'm just a regular neurotypical over here don't mind me hahahahahah

I don't have sensory issues. I just really needed something crunchy for lunch and the lettuce in my wrap wasn't crunchy enough so I alternated bites with chips to add crunchiness and I think if I didn't eat something crunchy my whole day would've been ruined.

IDC what those other monsters say. Mike Wasowski is terrifying. If I woke up with that little green guy on my chest in the middle of the night, I'd have a full blown panic attack. He deserved to be a scarer.

I just had a polite social interaction at work while battling an ear infection and I think I deserve the Nobel Peace Prize.

You mean my husband and I need to make sure we have food on the table for three people every day? Like... forever?

We got our toddler a pair of those fuzzy boots. The second I put them on her this morning, she looked at me and said "coffee?" I fear we've created a monster.

Pro tip to anyone else who gets a period: don't get the flu in the same week. I don't think there's enough water on earth to accommodate this.

My toddler just told me "hug slower." And you know what? I think I'm going to take that advice with me a lot of places, now.

In our house, there's no argument about who leaves the toilet seat up. We all put the lid down before we flush. It's the most sanitary.

Maybe intentionally dismantling the public school system had exactly the consequences they wanted

A picture of Death with skull and black robes, in an office environment, hunched over a computer. Under the picture is the text: “For the last time: Abyss = for staring into Void = for screaming into Please stop screaming into the abyss we are not insured for that”

This is my $25 thrift shop find! I wore it for Xmas this year ❤️

Yes!!! This is why universal design is so important. It rejects that idea that spaces and tools should be designed for the "typical" human and rejects the need for accommodations. Everyone should be able to use the things that are intended for everyone.

It wasn't on the breakfast menu but I asked anyway 🤣

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Also, yes I had an M&M McFlurry at 9am on a Monday. And I'll do it again.

I think TikTok's format is just better. Full-screen, doesn't have tons of annoying pop-ups, and keeps you on the video you're interacting with without auto playing something else. It's easy to scroll to more content you like and scroll past content you don't like. Plus the editing features 👌

The M&M McFlurry is better than the Oreo. Change my mind.

You've just gotta pull yourself up by your bootstraps