Spooky 𝕋𝕚𝕞 🇨🇦

After all it’s a fantasy.

Most people are pretty nice to me here and it freaks me out a little.

Stupid shit on repeat does not make you relevant.

I've conquered my demons. Now..what.

what an embarrassing time to be alive

I spent the day with me. I kinda like her.

Excuse me while I slip into something more less.

Mirror my personality and chill?

Does this fanny pack make my ass look lame?

People come into your life for a reason, and sometimes that reason is very stupid.

If you're reading this, I challenge you to a duel.

Bring snacks

Redundancy is redundant, he said redundantly.

Wanna play dead and chill together..flirting.

In the absence of anything holy, thank god.

The h in chode is silent. The e is not.

He’s a 10 but still hangs out in the man cave he assembled in the garage during covid

I don’t hold grudges, just a few people in my basement.

I'm dropping mom jokes with your mom in the room, idgaf

Fact: “Come Together” by The Beatles was about having a threesome

[giving treats to dog]
thank you for not being people

Walked into my bedroom in the dark and felt like the furniture had been moved.

There's this thing called the "block button"...learn it, know it, use it.

Friend: I found your doppelganger

*shows you picture of the worst looking person you've ever seen in your life*

If you can’t find a man who meets your expectations, don’t be afraid to settle

And by settle I mean settle in at home for some quality you time by yourself long-term, because living without bs doing whatever the fuck you want is genuinely wonderful and way under rated. 11/10 stars, would recommend

Earning blocks by being myself..goals.

Umm hey guys… I don’t think this felon is following all the laws.

Practice receiving! You are deserving of good things, too.

I make things impossibly awkward just by opening my mouth and being me

Some of you re-use the same password across multiple apps.. and it shows

what impresses me is not only could she live in a shoe, but she managed to have numerous children there, too.