Yebon

I just had, one of the most vivid, like, in brain hallucinations(?)
Awful experience, funny as hell though
Still awful
It wouldn't stop making shapes then shapes into faces then they kept changing and it just exponentially kept growing
Managed to make it slow down so it's, back to normal now i guess

I know it's not normal, but I wonder if it's common
common enough for people to have figured out the solution

i feel trapped by my own self
it's frustrating, knowing what's wrong and yet the body does not listen

I'm in a state of being I don't like being in, and it's going to last quite a while.

i am officially locking in!!!

everyone around is so pretty

I don't remmeber if i posted this from the walk

I have 5 sealed VHS tapes
One looks broken though

im a bit better now

just tired

feel sick

i think i've calmed down enough to finally fall asleep

im so exhausted i can't even put it into words

i just feel worse after the walk actually

ducks and geese

Still feel like shit

Went on a walk

it's awful

I think I'm going insane

quiet

i want to stop dreaming
i want to stop hoping
i want to stop wishing
i want to stop hurting from when it all comes crashing down
i don't want to go through it all for nothing anymore
im

tired

my role ends at the start of all journeys

I would like to cry forever
and yet i know it'd do nothing
it would never be enough
so much has passed, so much has happened
my tears are worth nothing
i'm at the end of it all, nothing will change
it's too late, it's too early
it's been all over since the start

suffocating

It's incredibly difficult to sleep without hugging something

Almost blew my fuse at work im so fucking close to losing it

It's so loud

i don't understand how I've made it this far in life, this horrendous piece of me hasn't stopped ruining things for decades
It's getting so exhausting

it's so exhausting
no matter what i do, my brain will keep self-sabotaging me
it'll never end
it'll only get quieter at times
but it'll always be there
annoying me
affecting me
i just want to rip it apart