𝗘𝘀 🍰

I know I'm the one who posted my 🍓-page link, but I'd be lying if I said I don't feel immediate dread and anxiety for 0.2 seconds when seeing asks in my ask box because of all the vile messages I used to get daily fdfhskhfskj

I keep forgetting this account exists 😭

I am genuinely convinced my ma!n might actually be shadowbanned at this point tbh

Someone adding me to an 00mf list after following me, before I ever saw it or followed them back, lowkey scared the fuck out of me because ??? i thought people usually only added close/fave m00ts to those 😭

I know oomf is mostly joking, but it kinda sucks seeing them openly hate on your faves, even as a joke 😭

my cats are genuinely the only thing keeping me from ending it right now i'm not even gonna lie

my purse was totally trashed and everything in it had been dumped out, including my name change papers which I had to tear the house apart to find. i genuinely have no way to get this fucking medicine nor a way to ask for help, so I might actually just fucking off myself

so that one family member told me not to worry, that he could pay for my medicine I literally NEED to survive and that I didn't have to save up money for it, but I have been. I had $91 saved up. now not only is he saying he's flat broke and can't do anything, but my money has gone missing.

OW someone followed me with my actual (uncommon) deadname hhhh i hate that........

I would too, but people are STILL reposting the doc (myself included) so them somehow not seeing it is... the fact that there's actual proof in the doc too is what bothers me the most about people still interacting with them

it baffles me how a doc THAT large/long can come out about someone with such horrific things and not only are they still posting like normal, but there's people still interacting with them like nothing happened

i mean sure, maybe they somehow didn't see the doc, but ://

"don't let this group of people interact with" "you need to let this group interact with you" "stop using this" "use this instead"

s t o p

people need to stop telling me what to do with my account 😭

??? people accused me of awful shit in my sp when I said I didn't care who interacted with me because my page is purely SFW so I changed it to only 17+ and now I keep getting people upset that it's over 17, I cannot fucking win here 😭

i didn't even know how to properly respond to it because it came off as lowkey rude to me for some reason

why the fuck would they comment that on my joke post? 😭

i'm not really active on bsky at this point, but i also have no intentions of going back to twt and i don't care for tumblr, so i guess i'm just disappearing lmao

I did decide to test it admittedly and see if I was being hidden by the algro or if it was genuinely a case of people just not really interacting with me anymore and I wanna still say it's just insecurity and I'm reading into it too hard, but oof...

mostly just insecurities tbh but it seems like the only posts I get engagement on are the ones where i'm assigning people things and it just felt really disheartening because I can't tell if it's just because that's the only interesting thing I post or if bsky is throttling my posts w to the @ thing

not only were they totally comfortable with stalking, and not only defended it + an actual stalker, but also admitted to doing so as well and they're LITERALLY a fucking gr00mer??? what are we DOING.... I'm so disappointed in these people for apparently just not giving a fuck

bro there's no way regular 00mfs of mine are STILL following and interacting with the p3d0, hello???? do we fr just not care anymore that someone has been outed as an actual gr00mer or what

i think my only value is giving others things lmao

oh you're good !! it's just the stress of bsky messing with my account and my interaction in general completely plummeting afterwards 😭It's just my nerves and depression acting up !!

if it weren't for a post I made yesterday about that situation popping off, I'd genuinely think everyone just has me muted at this point 😭

Oh wow, person who didn't see st@lking as a big deal and defended it even as such is a bad person, surprise surprise,,,

you know, yelling i'm going to k!ll myself after learning that fuckass man used ALL my coffee stuff was probably not the best thing to do but.. I mean, I might.

i so want to come out as a yume for a character like oomf did but I don't wanna get jumped 😭 even though everyone was totally fine with oomfs sharing theirs, I just KNOW i'm getting my 🍓page lit up if I do

people just straight up cannot tag me so I can't join interaction bait, it really feels like my posts aren't really being seen anymore either, and I'm just not doing well in general

so I just deactivated my account, I'll deal with that later or whatever

bsky completely throttling my engagement, plus me struggling deeply with interacting because I cannot shake the feeling of not belonging anywhere, has just made me lose all will to like... post at all

the urge to deactivate my main and just never go back to it is so fucking strong right now