Luke M

Got it. I'm sorry for your loss. To clarify: You want a eulogy for your father that's 𝘂𝗻𝗶𝗾𝘂𝗲, sounds 𝘀𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘁, and captures the 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗵𝗶𝗺. I get it. He wasn't just your father — he was your Dad. Here a few options I came up with:

One of the funniest things to come out of this are the brits who won’t leave Dubai even as it’s being bombed. One influencer adjacent guy went on a live stream on his balcony and said he’d rather be killed by Iran than go back to Wigan

"MUSLIM VOTER FRAUD IN GORTON & DENTON 🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨"

Pitch perfect by Guz Khan @guzkhan.bsky.social

🔗 via IG instagram.com/p/DVQ3DK7DHgZ

I've read that and, I'll level with you, there are worse things I've spent time with

When I moved to America I accessorised my Prince Albert with a Dick Cheney

This is a very good example of a post that I should apologise for, but won't. Both in terms of quality and unpleasant content

"Last night I watched a porno. It was based on a Hollywood blockbuster set in ancient Rome"

"Gladiator?"

"Yeah, she did seem pleased"

Indeed, there's a lot about the good old days that were in fact not good at all. In many cases the best thing about them is that they were a long time ago

This is a great read and alarmingly true. Next time you think about The Good Old Days, think of this and quell the urge to drink from the hose in the garden

Oh man, I'm so sorry x

How far back in time can you understand English? An experiment in language change

"As his post goes on, his language gets older. 100 years older with each jump. The spelling changes. The grammar changes. Words you know are replaced by unfamiliar words" Fascinating. So how far back in time can YOU go?

Mind launches inquiry into AI and mental health after Guardian investigation Exclusive: England and Wales charity to examine safeguards after Guardian exposed ‘very dangerous’ advice on Google AI Overviews

Mind launches inquiry into AI and mental health after Guardian investigation, by @andrewgregory.com www.theguardian.com/technology/2...

this is a very basic point to make but I hate that so many tech people are going "whoops haha AI is about to destroy society as we know it!" and yet incredibly few tech people are arguing in favour of just...slowing down the roll-out of AI, apparently progress must crush us and we have no say in it?

Andrew: I'm worried I'll be alone on my birthday

Thames Valley Police: Relax

Oh, the grand old duke of york
He ██████████████████
He ██████████████████
And he ██████████████████

Sesame Street educates its followers on iconic Black hairstyles in honor of Black History Month.

Tuning the Dial We’re lost in music, caught …………… at second slip, low down, by the outstretched hand of ……………….. the US vice president, JD Vance, who was spotted ... …………..….…. working as a waitress in a cocktail bar when …………………. Shostakovich’s Symphony No. 7 was premiered in the …………………..… Forties. South or southwest 5 to 7, occasionally gale ………..………… from Croydon is on the line, who wants to talk to us about ……………………….… why Aviva life insurance is right for you and …………………………………... offers me protection, a lot of love and affection whether I’m right or ………….…….….. left wing but there’s nobody in the centre and the ball gets cleared to ………..…….. ….......….…..... Oscar Wilde, who famously announced ‘I have nothing to declare except …………….…………… .……….….. I can boogie, boogie woogie all night long. Brian Bilston

Happy Radio Day to all those who celebrate.

Farage lecturing us on 'hard work' lol. What next? Are rabbits going to lecture us on family planning?

BBC News headlines: Education School caterers 'confident' of meat Missing children data 'worrying'

Happy 13th anniversary to this pair of matching news headlines.

God, winter sucks. I'm so ready to be warmed by something other than the continual burning rage inside me

This is not heartwarming. This is eerie and creepy as hell and absolutely a warning

Telling the FT to 'fuck off' is starting beef with Kendrick Lamar for people who don't know who Kendrick or what beef is.

This was in reply to a @thepokeuk.bsky.social story about Horrible Histories btw

Some racist waffle by a racist chinless prick

A fine example of the white 'race'

Why do white supremacists always look like this?

Not a fucking chin amongst them

Added Yakety Sax to that video from Minneapolis

Clouds that really, really look like a stack of dinner plates. God's own draining board

Me: You can't make me do the dishes! In fact, I'm not doing them until I get a sign from God himself!

God:

YouTube video by Michael Spicer The Room Next Door - Donald Trump and the New Guy

The Room Next Door - Donald Trump and the New Guy

Only on YouTube.

I'm not saying there isn't much to do around here, but I've just seen a man stop in his tracks to take a photo of some sick on the floor

You can test new tech ideas using the Seinfeld Test

Would the product eliminate the plot of an episode? (Google maps, cell phones, paypal, battery packs)

Good tech.

Would the product inspire new Seinfeld plots? (NFTs, AI chatbots, crypto currency, blindboxes, metaverse land sales)

Bad tech.

When Doomsday strikes, I pity the person who has to stay behind to adjust the clock accordingly while everyone else is running for their lives