@notonionsno.bsky.social
I write plays and eat garbage food.
This is the most production value that anyone has ever thrown at a play I’ve written. I cannot wait for this play to open in October.
09.07.2025 19:14 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0The company went under 6 years ago and I haven’t paid for it in over six years.
10.02.2025 20:10 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Do we think it’s too soon for me to throw away my movie pass card?
10.02.2025 19:21 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Thinking of setting my office on fire just to make it slightly warmer outside. The fact that I would get out of work is just a fringe benefit.
22.01.2025 15:16 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 02024 ended with me grinding and fellating a giant rubber chicken on the floor of Planet of the Tapes while I monologued about the nonsense of Descartes’ Ontological Argument for Gods Existence.
I don’t know if I have a defining moment as a professional silly person but that might have been it.
2025 and possibly 2026 might be the years in which I write nothing but sequels, and all of them with co-writers.
So be on the lookout for that I guess.
You know, if you’re one of the people who look out for plays I write.
Watching some YouTube video about the Radium Girls. It gets interrupted by an ad for some kind of skin cream and the very first thing the ad says is, “Ooh! Look at her skin! She’s glowing!”
Did…did they know what I was watching?
Anyone in the market for a doppelgänger? I know a guy who can make you a doppelgänger.
Well, actually, now it’s like nine guys who could make you a doppelgänger.
Is that what I’ve been doing wrong all these years?!!!
03.12.2024 21:30 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 01. It’s not disguised.
2. You say that like is a bad thing?
3. This show is really funny. You should come see it.
I’m wearing a reindeer onesie under a leather BDSM harness that crosses my chest, being lead around on a leash by a snowman-themed drag queen, in a large theater.
Welcome to tech week.
Dumb Bullshit My Spouse Did That Made Me Laugh
Me: You remember when we made smash burgers last night?
Spouse: Smash
Me: Well we had a very low burger-to-bun ratio.
Spouse: Smash
Me: So do you want to double up on-
Spouse: Smash
Me: …do you want to double up on patties or do you-
Spouse: Smash
These are super special Transgender™️ underwear for transgenders, so they’re for sure spiking the price due the “niche” of it.
Hopefully the fact that it’s a small company means they’ll at least be worth a damn?
