LancCo Rob (Give Me Whimsy, Damnit Edition)

When she says you can eat da booty

I hope his knee ligaments look like ground beef.

vile POS.

Of the albums that came out last Friday, The Midnight’s is FAR better than Taylor Swift’s.

Exactly. Plenty of more productive outlets for anger/frustration/hate than other Philly people who just happen to have a slightly different perspective on what the right decision in a baseball game was.

I’ll just add:

We can disagree about X decision/play in the game last night, but for fuck’s sake, *please* be nice to each other about it.

The world’s on fire. AI is everywhere. American political culture is an endless stream of diarrhea.

The least we can do is be nice to each other.

Those EARS 🤩

Working on it!

I don’t really have it in me to participate in The Discourse today.

I think the raw milk worms are getting to his brain. His situational hitting has been dogshit all season because he’s always thinking that now is the perfect time to hit a five-run homer.

He puts impossible expectations on himself because he wants to win so badly, but playing smart gets more Ws.

I would sooner army crawl naked through broken glass and rusty nails and dive into a pool of Listerine than I would read a word that Marcus Hayes wrote

Nah man I genuinely don’t believe I have it in me to see this team go out with a whimper in a game that Ranger *should* be starting but Nola will start instead. Can’t put myself through it.

Yeah I’m not tuning into that lol, I have more respect for myself and my mental health

Absolutely inexcusable that the team played with no heart and no brains for 8 full innings.

The season was fun, but this team doesn’t have the juice to sustain a run.

REDEMPTION FOR NICKY BONES!!!

…the JT in JT Realmuto stands for Jackin Tdoubles, I guess

Schwarber coming up tiny in October and Harper saying, “Hold my sparkling water” is NOT a recipe for playoff success.

This team shits the bed earlier and earlier every season. The clock is ticking down on this group, and maybe it should.

The Phillies are doing the light show for Jhoan Duran down three runs, and there was definitely some booing when the lights went down.

It just waters it down to do it in a situation like this.

Gonna hurl

Alright I’m gonna give it to a fuckin pterodactyl so it carries ur ass away, man

Jesús has risen, and I’m in hell

Brandon Marsh if you don’t have a read on him, don’t fuckin run on him dude 😭

Hey Blake Snell,

GO BIRDS

The Phils are honoring Roy Halladay’s postseason no-no tonight?

BRB, getting this ready

The loudest "skill issue" I've heard in a while

How today feels, knowing that my body is not built for the oxidative stress of Red October:

Pro tip, fellas: zoom in just a lil