mumbling my mantra to myself
“don’t be weird, don’t be weird, don’t be weird.”
0% success rate
mumbling my mantra to myself
“don’t be weird, don’t be weird, don’t be weird.”
0% success rate
🎵🎶wake me when fascism ends🎵🎶
yeah, no…it’s not very catchy
gotta do what cha gotta do
27.02.2026 21:28 — 👍 1 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
i’ve used everything in my apartment for mindfulness. now i have to start shipping the hookers in.
*grounding*
Fixing my problems one slice of cheese at a time.
26.02.2026 16:55 — 👍 27 🔁 15 💬 0 📌 0
chumbox ai slop advertisement showing an AI generated image of five old white men holding blister packs of pills with the copy “How To Pick The Best ED Treatment For You? ED treatment options differ. See how to find the best one for you.”
they’re ready to fuck
26.02.2026 16:59 — 👍 1112 🔁 103 💬 76 📌 29eww 😷
26.02.2026 20:36 — 👍 0 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
scene from saw guy with ax contemplating sawing his ankle
When the bottom of your sock gets wet
26.02.2026 14:08 — 👍 1325 🔁 257 💬 13 📌 6
anxiety and depression!? in this economy?
oh no yeah…that makes sense
Who you are when you’re tired is the real you.
26.02.2026 19:00 — 👍 22 🔁 15 💬 0 📌 0my dad got me a sweatshirt that says “first of all, i’m a delight,” so i’m getting him a t-shirt that says “i wasn’t yelling. i was parenting.”
26.02.2026 20:19 — 👍 115 🔁 39 💬 4 📌 0I should be getting kisses down my back but whatever
25.02.2026 18:38 — 👍 35 🔁 11 💬 2 📌 0Do these compressions socks make my butt look big?
24.02.2026 16:37 — 👍 16 🔁 9 💬 0 📌 0Why can’t a black hole just open up and take me right now?
23.02.2026 21:43 — 👍 72 🔁 29 💬 6 📌 0These are my emotional support compression socks.
24.02.2026 00:01 — 👍 16 🔁 6 💬 0 📌 0Is that a hot dog in your pants or are you just happy to see me?
22.02.2026 22:28 — 👍 13 🔁 7 💬 0 📌 0It’s pretty rude you don’t like my posts.
21.02.2026 18:06 — 👍 17 🔁 6 💬 0 📌 0old enough now that i should probably put “can identify the signs of a stroke” as a desirable attribute in my dating profile
21.02.2026 23:15 — 👍 3 🔁 3 💬 0 📌 0Crazy to think we got government files confirming alien existence released before we got GTA 6
21.02.2026 20:33 — 👍 48 🔁 14 💬 3 📌 1I am 50 years old and I still get nervous every time I cross my eyes to make a silly face and you all know exactly what I’m talkin about
21.02.2026 13:18 — 👍 176 🔁 48 💬 8 📌 0We’d be good together if he wasn’t such an unwavering prick
21.02.2026 18:41 — 👍 22 🔁 3 💬 0 📌 0no wait, i had something for this…can you come back to me later?
21.02.2026 20:31 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0given the current state of everything, being sterile is one of the nicer things about me
21.02.2026 20:28 — 👍 2 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0anyone wanna play sword in the stoned? last one unsheathed is a rotten egg
19.02.2026 17:13 — 👍 45 🔁 17 💬 3 📌 0Just a little more sleep then I’ll change my life
20.02.2026 00:17 — 👍 25 🔁 6 💬 0 📌 0i just wanna normalize men sitting to pee
19.02.2026 20:57 — 👍 3 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
giving up cool ranch doritos for lent
thank which ever gods that there are still spicy nacho and salsa verde
BREAKING: Dictators around the world delighted that U.S. President is so highly corruptible and willing to take bribes.
“Just tell him he’s handsome and offer him a golf course deal or a golden airplane, and he’ll sell you weapons, nuclear secrets, or microchips,” one dictator added.
I think it's really nice that the smoking hot Olympians take time out of having sex to compete in some of the events.
14.02.2026 03:28 — 👍 173 🔁 29 💬 7 📌 0