Christian Brown

Permanent magnets decay at a very slow rate if kept cool and dry, like cheese

Wow

you think John Wick ever walks into a room and there are guns covering every wall and big plate glass cases and he just knows he's gonna have to do soooo much work in a few minutes

may I recommend the One Battle After Another soundtrack for drowning out airport bar patrons listening to various tiktoks

working real blue in the group chat today

signed up for the mecha unit and they're saying my mecha will form the balls and ass of the giant dude our team assembles. i asked if they could make me like the back or the foot or something and they said it's either balls and ass or i have to give back my signing bonus and join the infantry

bro. you're such an eligible bachelor bro

AMELIA BEDELIA'S BOYFRIEND, NICK: ahah whaaaat?? you're so funny babe

alternate history oreos. man in the high castle shit. like what horrible past divergence had to occur to make this

it's simple: if the drug is a plant, it's fantasy. if the drug is an eye dropper, it's sci fi

requesting Menomena at karaoke to ruin the night of everyone who isn't exactly 38 years old

everyone give it up for
*airhorn airhorn airhorn* d-d-d-d-d-d DJaaaay DRACulaaaaaaaaaa

white boy raps every line in Bombs Over Baghdad PERFECTLY astonishing karaoke crowd

but not the slurs. please write down that he did not say any slurs

@tessastrain.bsky.social help me

unfortunately cowboy culture is calling to me... the desire for a stupid hat... an embroidered shirt........

french Guy Fieri

strangers don't really come to town any more

miles should i read madame bovary

computer, show me magic eye

remember how popular magic eye paintings were in the 90s? amazing how silly it seems now. so much money and retail space devoted to how the human mind looks for patterns and is amazed to find them. anyway how'd the big new LLM launch go

DWARF CONTRACTOR: *on the phone* alright so tell me this, BEFORE hand, how greedily were you digging.. uh huh... and how deeply? okay, I don't even need to come out, I can tell ya right now you gotta balrog. I'm gonna be honest with ya, does this mine hold any sentimental value

funniest kind of 9/11 joke has to be imagining some sort of 9/11 sequel, like french 9/11, italian 9/11, 9/11 2: legacies, etc

come on down to il pirata's oyster open where anyone who shows before noon gets a free oyster

ok it was an oyster bar but also I was the only one there so it was also a poster bar

reading pynchon in the poster bar with a martini and a diet coke back

it's like in the last act of a jrpg where they just start palette swapping sprites from the beginning of the game

still thinking about how good the new Naked Gun is. just smiling and hearing the jokes again in my head

educating the group chat about the Rizzler, out of spite

*nervously, to head of product development* is that good

it's a pdf viewing system

remember the Apple Vision Pro? that was a good bit