Jean-Paul Blartre: Mall Cop

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shared because us Blarts gotta stick together

djSaturnine - Twitch HAUNTED CHILLROOM: dark ambient, uneasy listening, drone

*racking shotgun* i said EVERYBODY walk the dinosaur

ope, safety overturned on replay apparently

Dak gets a safety and we have a 3-5 score in Lions-Cowboys, this game is hilarious

You're a daisy if you do

This sure is some mom texting lmao

the biggest lie in american politics, probably only second to bush lying us into iraq, has been democrats constantly telling us "we just can't..." only to watch republicans do whatever the fuck they want over and over and over. makes me sick.

Your honesty is appreciated, chicken boo

Red Lobster never released a commercial with a jingle that went “Shrimply having a wonderful Fishmastime.” That’s why they went bankrupt.

the ‘D’ in ‘edm’ stands for ‘dumbass’

Next you're going to tell me he has weird views on sex and women

Wait, Robert Crumb has become a paranoid old crank who hates modernity? Robert Crumb?? Damn, you never can tell

Poor Bert. :( bsky.app/profile/theo...

I once had a salty vet who described her dog as "she's just a bitch and I mean more than biologically". bsky.app/profile/skel...

I think a lot of people twist themselves into pretzels justifying why they can't stop using a service or a platform. I would much prefer it if they went "these ethics don't really matter to me; I just want to be entertained." It would be more honest!

It's funny that all these guys are so very, pathetically, obviously huffing their own farts via hired sycophants and chatbots that they're all unironically spinning up stupid comic book supervillain ideas

They're spending hours a day coked up asking a chatbot to regurgitate the plot of old Superman

Elliot Stabler from SVU yelling at a male suspect

Her Listening Age was 16 you sick fuck

Hello Boobie Feaster, meet SirPaul Cheeks.

I think he is one of those guys where you have to be such an intense dork to make movies the way he does that it pushes out any likable qualities. Kind of a Kevin Smith Wario, where Kevin Smith makes movies like he does because he is an affable stoner dork (but much more mixed bag, qualitywise)

The Death Riders are gonna be lining up to kill him like the scene in Airplane where the entire plane lines up to slap the hysterical lady

If you weren't already in love with Mina Shirakawa, prepare to fall hard for this amazing gal. This episode of #AEWUnrestricted is one of my favorites. It's a emotional roller coaster - hilarious, heartfelt, and heartbreaking. ALSO SHE RESCUED A CAT!!

Listen now: open.spotify.com/episode/24mx...

As someone whose game name is "Notice Me Savathun-pai", you are seen and you are valid

While making breakfast, the fork calls to him to stab himself like the Green Goblin mask

I believe i read it was what Mox was calling them but I may be making that up

The dynamic is pretty clearly that Stat and Willow got divorced and now have shared custody of Harley, who's trying to pretend everything is still normal. #AEW

i’m the guy at kohler whose job is to look at your diarrhea photos against your will. it’s a living!

you can be the most reasonable, intelligent, measured person on the planet and 3 minutes of a migraine will have you looking longingly at a drill and considering whether trepanning was honestly that bad of an idea