chexmix

I have mixed feelings on this

I want to wake up to him making breakfast and handing me a cup of coffee saying "theres my sweet pea" and giving me a big hug.

And then i cum uwu

Based and chad pilled

It's one of those things you get the answer when you look in the mirror

Hmm? What's that? I'm still in 2009 playing Devil May Cry 3 on the ps2

Sounds like a game people play at an office, each week a new person puts a frame around the picture of Roger Rabbit, and everybody has to guess who framed Roger Rabbit.

What a chad

You mean Gold video from a little while ago

Some are born oil, some achieve oil, and some have oil thrust upon them

Don't forget the wacky 3 numbers on the back

"Oh, hello. Nice shirt. Eat lots of nuts? Uh, I mean from the Gas station. Uh I mean the Buckee's. Do you like Buckee's nuts? Oh, no I mean... uh sorry"
:( im not a good rizzler at a bar, usually dudes come up to me to tell me my chest is hot.

Put the dress back on

It's not nice to laugh at himbos. We try really hard to keep up with the conversations and breathing while blinking

Whether your brother or whether you're a mother you're stayin alive staying alive feel the city breakin and everybody shakin and we're stayin alive stayin alive

Well you can tell by the way I use my walk I'm a woman's man no time for talk Music loud and woman warm I've been kicked around since I was born and now it's all right it's okay and you may look the other way but we can try to understand the New York Times don't make the man

I would have kept all my CRTs if they didn't fucking break

16, but I'm not that old I swear, it's just the house I grew up in wasn't modern

Also no 19?

He looks like it would be really fun to oil him up and rub him down.

Based

O, thank the Lord! I've been applying for the past 3 months and still haven't gotten anything

Do it again

Hmm... these are all skinny pokemon or big round pokemon...
I think you have a type

🏜💄🌮🏞

We all laughed at her when she was hurting the most makes me wanna take it all back 😔

No i don't forgive her for that angelfood Kwanzaa cake.

This sounds like a Jerma bit

Sandra Lee is the ex wife of Cuomo?

It makes so much sense now to me that she givex the "drunk aunt" persona now.

Why not Sugar Boi Pepsi Fuck, or Sbpf for short.

Unsolicited chest pic

Garrus is love, Garrus is life

Hello, waiter! I'll take 4.