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Any time I don't take off early, my package comes early and I have to spend the rest of the work day fretting over whether or not it will still be on the porch when I get home. BUT NOW?!?!?! NOW IT WANTS TO COME LATE 🫩

Like, I masturbated and everything and it's still not here.

Impatiently waiting for my B A S S

We're doing Secret Santa again this year, and the limit is $25 and people can put three items on their list and you can choose one, but since I'm single with no kids, I usually end up buying everything on their list.

I asked for a gift card, OPI black nail polish, or Jim Dunlop Flow Gloss picks 3mm

Getting off early 👀👀👀👀👀

"Every Miku is cannon" who fucking lied to you?

YouTube video by Alizée Alizée - Mademoiselle Juliette (Clip officiel)

youtu.be/zOefHqSunvA?...

Sometimes I think I'm crazy and then I remember there are people who have multiple accounts on social media to stalk people. Brody, I don't even feel like making ONE account if I don't have to, let alone MULTIPLE

No one talks about the slut shortage.

Where are the sluts?!?!?!?! 😩

Ngl, I'm so glad my period is over.

Boom.

Not now kitten, daddy is crashing the fuck out

So much blood ran from my eyebrow down my cheek to under my chin. I felt like a kid again 😌

The funniest thing about taking the light rail in the morning is that everyone is asleep. You sit down and as soon as the train pulls off, you become just another hunched over body in a seat. You develop a 6th sense for knowing when to wake up in time not to miss your stop.

Why did I sad pop songs to my work playlist?

Who am I kidding, that's just my omni-playlist.

YouTube video by TLCVEVO TLC - Damaged (Official Video)

youtu.be/reG7Iu8seos?...

"So when you say that you need me
That you'll never leave me
I know you're wrong, you're not that strong
Let me go"

YouTube video by georgemichaelVEVO George Michael - One More Try (Remastered) (Official Video)

"'Cause teacher
There are things that I don't want to learn
And the last one I had
Made me cry
So I don't want to learn to
Hold you, touch you
Think that you're mine"

youtu.be/6r5Dhqaay4E?...

Get something simple like your ear for starters, if those aren't pierced already 🤔

Piercing appointment today too? Oh, it's gonna be a good day, chooms.

Boom

YouTube video by NBCUniversal Music Channel MELL - Red fraction(Audio)

youtu.be/FM3JRDvthok?...

Wtf kinda ad is this?!

I can't eat until after my doctor's appointment today since they're checking my fasting blood glucose level 😔

That's not until 12:30pm though and I haven't eaten since 2pm yesterday. It was my bad. I could have had something last night but I was sleepy after work 🥹

No, I will not stop embarrassing myself. I don't know how to stop embarrassing myself.

Seasonal depre— just kidding. I have a chronic case.

YouTube video by MariahCareyVEVO Mariah Carey - Breakdown ft. Krayzie Bone, Wish Bone

youtu.be/bC7V9dn1rC8?...

Someone liked a comment I left on a TikTok and I was taken aback because they looked EXACTLY like my ex, so I went to their profile and they're in their younger 20s and live in Australia, and I was like... "Oh, okay." But that could be her twin. Red hair and all. It was uncanny as fuck.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.