John/JC

Interesting that “heck” is the PG term when it sounds like the combination of hell and fuck

I regularly see Hogwarts Legacy on sale for like 90% off. Joanne you horse’s ass…

My moral compass keeps me from listening to idiot podcasters but my ADHD keeps me from listening to ANY podcasts

The Teletubbies were between 6.5 and 10 feet tall in their costumes

teletubbies should have hooped instead of worshipping the sun baby cause they tall as hell

Genocide is so fucking stupid man. How self important do you have to be to think your survival depends on the extermination of an entire people

I’ve been lower middle class my entire life and only just started eating ramen this year. Am I a fraud?

Where the fuck is Superman when you need him?

MrBeast: I built a giant Christmas tree out of silver!

Me: I’m in credit card debt cause I wanted to eat this month

Generative AI joins Lena Dunham and Amy Schumer in the “things no one likes but is just popular enough to stay relevant” category

Look guys I know we’re having the time of our lives with this but in all seriousness Donald was just trying to help Bill while he was sick. He had ligma

You ever think about how for years we’ve been told that the government is run by Satantic pedos by a bunch of Christian pedos

Man I hate gay Halloween. What do you mean you’re my intrusive thoughts personified

“good jeans” I don’t give a damn how good they are as long as they fit my bodacious hips and big beautiful ass

wait why are there Nazis here

*vibing in purgatory* tell me again how you wanted cheaper eggs

They have made the world living hell for no reason whatsoever. People will ask why this happened in a decade and there will be tremendous effort to make it more complicated than “they were evil, stupid, and bored”

(hear me out) all religious states are a bad idea

“people are so fake” yeah cause no one likes it when we’re real. you really wanna hear about my 7th existential crisis of the day?

if you’re born into wealth, the world is your bitch
if you’re born poor, you’re the world’s bitch
Welcome to StreetMarx, a hip person’s guide to socialism

Autistic enlightenment is realizing you’re just an IRL Tim Robinson character

Call me basic or stupid but I think the only way we’ll ever achieve world peace is if aliens point a giant space laser at the earth and threaten to blow it up if we keep fucking around

Elon Musk owns us and I can’t even find joy in eating a goddamn grape

Am I depressed or am I just not a kid anymore

Most of the world’s brightest minds are hard at work developing new ways for you to get depression from a computer

Whenever I read anything about AI I just picture the worst people I can think of getting profoundly hard at the thought of rejecting human connection for a few bucks

Elon Musk wants to shutdown USAID because USAID played a significant role in helping to end Apartheid in South Africa. The US media really failed at doing its job as few Americans know Elon Musk has long been embracing South African Apartheid and wants to see it implemented in the US.

Call me by whatever but if it’s up to me then it’s burnt out doofus

I don’t even care what my pronouns are at this point in my life but if the feds ask I’ve been a dude my whole life

Conservatives hate wokeness more than they love themselves