aroceu (archive)

anyway what no one but lwj knows is that wwx is the only coworker that he wants to bang. despite any distaste 😌 and soon after lwj gets to open what he's always wanted most: wwx's hole

little does lwj know that this is another one of wei ying's pranks! he thinks nothing of all the times wwx has come to him batting his eyelashes asking for help opening a water bottle until he walks in on wwx popping open a vacuum sealed shut container with ease

#mdzs coworkers wangxian where wwx annoys lwj so much that everyone knows that wwx is lwj's "least favorite" coworker. however wwx also frequently asks lwj to open bottles/containers/etc for him so lwj does, thinking that despite his visible distaste he's still being helpful to wwx

it's a good thing when they're adults they only care to play hide and seek by themselves 🙄

#mdzs kids wangxian playing hide and seek except every time they play wwx demands to be the seeker and finds lwj first (on purpose) and they get distracted and don't find anyone else. jc refuses to play with them. lwj has never tried to remind the babbling wwx about the other kids.

wwx coming in to the kitchen where lwj is shirtless and making tea: [brain short circuiting] um, hi
lwj, fixed on wwx's nipple and the untouched biteable length of his neck: hello

#mdzs roommates wangxian who always walk around shirtless/in nothing but boxers all the time bc they both think they're Just Guys Being Dudes but they're actually driving each other insane at the same time

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lmao i have NOT been tagging my posts with #mdzs. woops!

u can't fault wangxian fans for seeing blue and red and always making them wangxian bc wwx himself literally just could see a cloud in the sky and be like "oh lan zhan...i remember when we met...just thinking about him<3"

wangxian meeting by fighting over the last hollow sounding watermelon at the supermarket

anyway now think of the modern au version where they're also cringe bc wwx goes through his emo/black clothes red lipstick heavy eyeliner phase and lwj goes through his reading glasses every day/sweater vests even during the summer phase and still fall in love 🙄

they saw each other at their most cringe and still had crushes on each other! that's true love babe! and now wwx annoys lwj not exclusively to make him mad but bc he knows lwj loves it; and every time lwj breaks a single rule it delights wwx like it's the first time :)

man i love how embedded into their dynamic it is that wangxian first met as teens. wwx was at his most tryhard & lwj at his most rule-loving but that's their basis! teens as a rule are at their most obnoxious & wx aren't an exception! they'd probs both have flawless skin tho🙄

lwj resolutely thinks "you think i would ignore wei ying who wants me to kiss him??" but his throat is in pain so he can't say much at all. wwx tsks & says "ah my troublesome boyfriend." ofc this doesn't stop him for asking for kisses the next time he's sick anyway

before wangxian get together, if wwx is sick lwj somehow always ends up his caretaker & wwx would ask for kisses/cuddles & lwj naturally refused him. but after they get together, suddenly lwj is always sick after wwx who says "ah lan zhan what happened to ignoring my jokes!!"

wangxian going hiking where they both leg it effortlessly uphill for like five miles to the peak but then when they come down wwx whines like "😫 lan zhan i'm so tired!! 😩 i'm so weak!!! 🥺 could you carry me back down??" and so lwj gives him a piggyback ride 4 miles downhill

the new year's of the year they finally get together wwx waits until the clock strikes midnight and then kisses the sleeping lwj himself 😇 lwj unconsciously kisses back. nhs takes a photo of it. both wwx and lwj are pleased with this version of their new year's kiss 🥳🥳

i see everyone's (literally saw 5 scrolling down my tl just now) wangxian's kiss at midnight on new year's headcanons and raise you: lwj trying valiantly every year to stay up to midnight on new year's with wei ying in an effort to perhaps kiss him but always passing out at 9pm

anyway, later most people do not get better about remembering lwj. but some do! saying "the podcast you and your friend lan zhan have!" but wwx corrects them too, saying, "no, it's the podcast me and my BOYFRIEND lan zhan have 🥰🥰"

wwx is happy doing 99% of the talking & lwj is happy with wwx doing 99% of the talking 🥰 sometimes love is watching ur podcast partner talk for approximately 60 minutes straight. sometimes 100 minutes, even if you're paying attention to the time and he's not 😂

wangxian running a podcast together but it's 99% wwx talking with lwj interjecting a "mn" once in a while, and on extremely rare occasions, "yes," "no," and "wei ying." ppl often mistakenly refer to it as wwx's podcast (lwj is not offended by this) but wwx always corrects them.