Lair Of The Gurt Sherm (Stoker 1911)

I just have one thing to say about/to Marlins Man who has been doing this for a decade:

We get it, you're rich beyond belief, I don't like you.

aaron judge's face over judge reinhold's body in one of the beverly hills cop movies

aaron judge reinhold

How can you not be romantic about baseball?

Personally I want to grow old with the foul ball pole in right field, raise a family, fall in love again every day <3

It'd be a funny bit just have an otherwise nonexistent nameplate with "LAST NAME" or something on the jersey

crime without the violence = yes

I know the answer! Yankees and Rockies. I know a lot about the '95 playoffs as an ATL fan.

things i have:

1. one too many hot dog buns
2. a random erection
3. a really funny idea involving wasting bread

urgh damn yankees

head injuries are no joke, kids

Sometimes I forget that the World Series used to be the only playoff in MLB but I was born in 1995 so even then I've only ever known baseball with at least a League Championship Series as well.

Absolutely flawless. What are the fuckin' odds?

I don't want to live in a world without Dolly. I really hope she's okay.

The Yankees' no beard rule has always been so bizarre to me, even as a kid. They're grown men and you're policing their appearance? Odd.

two pilots walking toward a plane fighting over who's captain and who's first officer, call it ground beef

This Baseball vs. Rain boxing match SUCKS.

hanging a sign that says "enter as strangers, leave as friends" above the bathroom glory hole

no like really i had no idea about the energy input when i was just like "stealing art is bad"

*shaking fist* i was anti-AI long before i knew how much energy it takes from the earth

Guys, every person you see on Fox News in a mask is just Robert O'Neill, retired Navy Seal and occasional Fox News contributor. He's the former Antifa, former Gazan, former gang member. His eyes are very unique.

I would demolish each and every one of these. Keep up the good work, Detroit.

Rhyming taxes with "facts is" always makes me wince

They are actually related.

The only Newsom from California I'd vote for is Joanna and I don't even like her music that much

Doctor's office is across from a high school football field and they just started blasting Straight Outta Compton before practice.

Hell. Yes.

ralph wiggum's baby speech

conservatives sound like "an undocumented immigrant and an antifa 'member' were in the closet making communist babies and I saw one of the communist babies and the communist baby looked at me"

Another thing about presuming heterosexuality:

Why have I and many bi/pan people been in many hetero relationships compared to homosexual?

There are soooooooo many more straight and bi/pan women than there are bi/gay men. And vice versa. Most people identify as straight and cis.

💕

I guess I should talk more about how I love Cher as much as I love Metallica

Bengals legend Joe Flacco

It's really weird to me (I know me, sure) that anyone assumes me to be straight because I feel like I'm outwardly pretty fruity.

I have a very adequate dong.

No but really I've used the following phrase many times when people have questioned it:

"I wanted to try sucking a dick once and I liked it enough to do it many more times."