DALIA MALEK ☥

Went into fight or flight watching that video, my nervous system is in knots

beautiful

It soothes my bitter heart to know that no matter how much money Elon Musk has, he will never, ever be funny

t.co/QhuKU9HCxA

you heard me

Got my breathing app on easy mode, no time for lung capacity in this economy

This must have been flagged as rude because it describes a rude thing someone did after doing a bunch of other rude things

This has to stop happening, are you SURE dick cheney wasn’t already dead?

danny trejo in a soft sweater

Actually delighted that fb thinks i’m the right demographic for kotn’s tough guys soft sweaters campaign

Ppl who think there’s no guns in the UK haven’t lived in the country, over here it’s vietnam season

a treasure

New career path: Telling everyone that I use generative AI for everything (and then just half-assing it with my own brain) so people I don’t respect throw piles of money at me and are cool with the final product being bad.

I’m exhausted.

I think i’ve said this before on another app, i have no idea what anyone is talking about

Is it still called a midlife crisis if the only planet i can breathe on won’t last past my 40s

Just putting it out there, if 14 million of you send me a dollar at least 2 of my problems will be solved

May you and your family have a blessed international wombat day, to those who observe

I think the iPhone has a bit of a cheek trying to make you capitalise ‘Apple’ as if they were there before the Garden of Eden.

READING IS NOT HARD

WHAT’S HARD IS FINDING A WEBSITE YOU DON’T ALREADY KNOW THE URL TO

CAN THE INTERNET JUST LET US FIND THE THINGS AGAIN

I never wanted kids because i have myself been born, i’d never do that to someone

it should not be legal or allowed, i won’t accept it

Black messiah felt like a signal of so more to come 😔

I miss when the idiot box was the tv & not the global network of all human knowledge & contribution

This post tells you everything you need to know about modern academia

A popular app for organizing reading materials has been updated with integrated AI to do the reading, but they still haven’t fixed the left column being too narrow to read with no option to resize the column or the text

muah

Don’t ask if i know things, i’ve been alive too long to even know which part of my memory to search & sure maybe some version of me learned a thing but i can’t be responsible for her now, also every meal hard resets my brain so assume i can barely remember how to keep my nervous system idling

If you name your robot vacuum, you like slavery

If renee zellweger isn’t in today’s ep of only murders in the building tuesday is canceled

Hold up i was still getting fat from when we were doing body positivity & y’all changed it on me

If you say “we live in hell, how bout you?” using the same tone as “i’m doing fine, how bout you” you will find that it works & is the correct answer