Gh0sstly

I love my job

I wish I knew the difference between heartburn and a cardiac event

Leave them unblocked. Make them suffer your presence.

My restless legs don’t care what time it is.

*record scratch*

[me drunk] do u think ill find love

looking for love in 𝙖𝙡𝙡 the places: right places wrong places gray areas—no one will be spared

never more vulnerable than when naked in front of a cat with the zoomies

Another day another flight

Please sir, I'm a joyless husk

i have muted so many people, it's so peaceful

Throwing myself violently on to my bed several times a day is a form of therapy.

Me:
[orders pizza]

Them: Would you also like our cheesy bread with sauce?

Me: Are you trying to sell me a side of pizza with my pizza?

Me: 2 please.

Slowly paddles out into the abyss wearing arm floaties

when does a duper become super

imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing the humpty hump.

apparently i think everyone hates me and is mad at me today

Sushi Sex
🤝
hitting it raw

I keep losing track of who's on to me.

bit of a cunt when i'm overwhelmed huh

I love him

BATMAN ASMR: Batman Does Your Fall Festival Makeup Using Utility Belt Tools 🍂💄1 HR SOFT BRUSHING + CLOSE-UP WHISPERS*

If you don't dry hump me from behind whenever I bend over to pick something up, what are we even doing?

sorry for being a huge bitch it's just something I love doing

I hate it when I imagine how a conversation will go and then in the actual conversation the person goes off script. That’s not your line, Todd.

Another day, another *reminds myself to unclench my jaw*

Sex so bad she orders some comfort food in the middle of the act.

We the people demand a decent hug emoji