certified sad jade

Shes irreplaceable and I just can't get her out of my head

Just got back from trick or treating with my gf...
K it was fun ngl but I couldn't hug her or give her a proper goodbye or anything bc her dad was there,,, but it was fun either way

My life is just gonna feel empty without her i hate this

I was not prepared for this today. fuckkkkkkk

Away. I just wanna die. I can't take this. All I have from her are a few gifts. At least I have a ring that I can wear that I got from her today. Anyways, that's it.

Deal with this either. She's gonna be in a completely different country and we can't communicate. What if one day something happens and I can't know? We rely on eachother, and she could've done so much more this school year. The musical, jazz band, band, choir, etc. But her parents have to take it

...eachother grow, she could've watched our schools musical with me in it, she could've stayed here with all of her friends, etc. But now its all gone. She's the personification of my will to live. She was funny, and had so much in common with me. I can't take this anymore. I don't know if she can

...trick or treating, but that's it, and her dad will also be following behind us, so I can't even hug her or anything. I just wanna die. She was the only reason I'm alive. She's the reason I found out im trans. She's shaped me as a person. And now I suddenly have to say goodbye. We could've watched

...return in 3 months, but I don't know if I can make it that long. I loved her so much, yet we could only have a year together. Not to mention theres a large chance she won't return. I never got a chance to give her a gift yet shes given me so many. I have one more chance to see her tonight while

... especially with eachother, we were actually both crying earlier, which i can barely even cry. I just don't have anyone that I trust anymore, no one that likes the same things as me, etc. Why does it have to be me? Its always bad stuff that happens to me. Always. I just wanna die. She might

...talking, and it came up that she had something to tell me. I asked her and after some hesitation, she just laid it on me. She ended venting a lot, and I was just so in shock that I couldn't talk for an entire hour, like the words just couldn't come out. We've both had so many memories here,

This might be a long thread, I have no idea atm
Today I found out my gf is moving away. Like tomorrow. The thing is, she has limited access to discord so I can't really talk to her. She's the one person I actually trust, so this period of my life is just getting even harder. At lunch today, we were

The buddy knight 😏

I feel off, I just don't know in what way

Wait what this account is on there

Idk i just feel nothing

I feel empty

I can't really remember what I was thinking of atm,,, I was just getting more and more stressed because no one was replying (dw not your fault)

Please pay attention to me i need help

Please

Please pay attention to me

Everything stresses me out
Seeing myself in a mirror
Seeing myself in a window
Being near either of the 2 at all
Even seeing my shadow
Seeing anyone that resembles me in any way
They can bring to the point of sweating
They bring my heart rate up
I hate it so much

Everytime i look in a mirror, im reminded that ill never pass as a woman. I hate it.

There is nothing to enjoy about my life

Idk how???? It just feels absolutely disgusting to eat anything

I almost never eat lunch anymore, im just repulsed by the idea of eating so other than lunch, I barely eat anything

Hewwo :3