“”

God is dog spelled backwards ;)

You ever just walk around your neighborhood? Just got a silver alert on my phone and thought I’d give it a try

The doctors have declared me “sexually disabled”

Face it, Italian women do it better

Whenever the hospital puts you in the biggest nicest room with no other patients just know it’s because they think there’s a very good chance that you’re going to die

For the first time in many many years, I renewed my Costco membership got me feeling like the prodigal son

Before Fleetwood Mac made history in 1977 with the release of their album Rumours, no band had ever had the idea to make every song on a record good

It’s better to have pugged and lost than to never have pugged at all

My IG suggested page is literally just a wall of Dua Lipa pics

Tough call, to me; Piano Teacher/White Ribbon

Frustrated, telling my dog in all earnestness; build a new route to China if they’ll have you

people like to make a big deal out of alf’s hog on here but I feel it unfairly maligns him to describe it so salaciously. he’s not erect in that photo. it’s not lewd. it’s presented, I think, very tastefully. like a michelangelo

YouTube video by @HOLLYWOOD Amour (2012) - Official Trailer [HD]

Rewatch and still Haneke’s best to me, not by a wide margin at all but still youtu.be/F7D-Y3T0XFA?...

Thank you G*d 🙏

She uh., this thing on?? She uh.. rigged my tony, called it pasta.

FEDERAL AGENT PULLED FROM THE FINAL STAGES OF A TEN YEAR INVESTIGATION TO CAPTURE THE KILLER RESPONSIBLE FOR THE "HOUSTON HATCHETMAN" SERIAL MURDERS TO PATROL TOURISTS ON THE NATIONAL MALL: hey. you can't vape there

Hey G*d it’s me, I am ready for another sociopath 🙏

I love scrolling through instagram only to have some of the most narcissistically unhinged posts suggested to me from their shitty version of twitter

Coming to terms with the fact that my dog is not a “good boy”

“Whatup playa”

Smelling vaguely of stale urine at all times is every man’s second rite of passage marking the autumn of his life

What’s the over under on him getting popped versus his party pushing him aside due to Epstein

“If you want an image of the future, imagine a woman having sex with a man -forever”
George Orwell

The office #cuckchair

Get On The Toboggan -Life on the road with Black Flag

Going to start dying my grays so I look even more ridiculous

I spend the first two hours of every workday researching Dua Lipa’s rich Albanian cultural heritage as well as her dance moves

Coppola’s best

Gene Hackman is my dad -rewatching The Conversation