ƧƎЯᗡAꟼ FAN

I offered them Mason Miller for Leo De Vries and they laughed me out of the room.

Jim Crane wouldn’t skip an opportunity to build his network for potential future war profiteering, it’ll be the Astros

have they tried calling out for yusuf instead

intellectual side of "I Will Pay Any Amount to Not Pay My Taxes"

i don't think clickhole meant to catch an extremely online baseball writer with their "the mlb" bait, but it seems like it happened? is this a layered bit?

my version of this would be getting a permanent key card for the hotel walk way at petco park what a convenience that would be

people forget that this *caused* the opioid epidemic

a red, white and green baseball hat with a meatball wearing a venetian gondolier's outfit with a big mustache. he's steering a boat of pasta in a river of marinara. this hat costs forty five dollars

you're wrapping up your meet-and-greet with Pope Leo XIV. as you shake his hand for the photo op, you surprise him with a Birminghamton Rumble Ponies Spicy Meatballs On-Field Cap. His Holiness accepts with grace, but you are struck with a bone-deep revelation he just asked God to send you to Hell

Does Blake now have the most WS starts in this group

"whimsy is woke and gay and for girls, not an option"
-blake treinen

Blake Treinen storms in to pitch in a 1-6 game

lmao

watching him pitch was miserable even as he won a cy young, but i thought he was a neat character off the field.

less so given his stance on ba*er

people seem to either love him unconditionally or they seem to be mad about how long he's willing to go into games now as though he wasn't throwing 100+ pitches constantly as a padre and just not getting any farther than the 5th. both seem odd to me

padres fans are exceedingly weird about blake snell

It’s been so long since the Blue Jays won the World Series that the last time it happened the President was born in 1946 and had ties to Jeffrey Epstein.

If you are not at risk it is your civic duty to tell these guys they are embarrassing worms if you see them patrolling a supermarket to arrest people that the government is intentionally starving

i wish our 26 year old legacy super star would ball the fuck out instead of mope around

i love that this picture is a perfect example of why they shouldn't

The mystery candidate is an AI chatbot named "Chartreuse", with whom AJ Preller has confided and chatted about baseball for a few years now.

The org that values Don Tricker because he asks questions like “why don’t you take BP at in-game velocity?” is doing 9 1/2 hour interviews with one of the greatest power hitters of all time lmao haven’t seen a front office do eyewash like this since they said Bob Melvin was coming back

albert pujols after a 9.5 hour interview with aj preller

can't stop laughing at this idiot making random gestures and thinking it will result swift tactical responses from the otherwise unemployable rejects who staff his agency

well qualifications and value aren't the same thing, but this discussion is like arguing about where to rearrange the deck chairs on the titanic and you're annoying so i'm gonna go do something else

that devalues esposito's major league coaching experience, which means he's not overqualified compared to hundley. thus: interchangeable slapdicks.

he's wildly more qualified than pujols too, but he's still not above him on the depth chart. this is probably a vibes based hire for better (pujols) or worse (flaherty)

interchangeable slapdicks

acee. pujols, esposito, niebla and a "mystery candidate"

I would rather Grok manage the Padres before even allowing Ryan Flaherty back in the building for an interview