Is it a hair dryer,

Or just an air wetter?

It's simply no matter,

I need to get better.

The early bird gets the worm,

The second mouse gets the cheese,

The later cat gets them both.

It's socially acceptable to name your child "Victor" but not "Winner".

Despite what a common expression may lead you to believe, apples and oranges are easily similar enough to be compared with one another.

Spoon manufacturers would make a lot more money if psychics existed.

The letters Q and Y should swap places in the alphabet, as Q is a weird letter similar to X and Z, while Y is a fairly common and respectable letter used both as a consonant and a vowel.

Hospitals and dating apps have the same goal: getting their customers to stop needing them.

Despite what their names may suggest, Marionettes are not designed for capturing Italian plumbers.

"PIN number" makes no sense, as the N already stands for number.

We might end up knowing more about the behaviour of rats than any other animal, just because we use them for testing so often.

A lot less people would eat them if they were called "Jack's flaps"

Will adverts for elderly people have to walk on a very fine line between "We're friendly and you should trust us!" and "You're going to die soon".

The weather girls are not a reputable organisation if they don't know their own sources.