Andrea

i don't know who needs to hear this but please remember it's not a toyotasprint it's a toyotathon

Ask yourself, "am I harder to kill than I was 8 years ago?"

I've cooked for men I should have poisoned.
So...yes...I have self control.

Genuinely felt more edge of seat excitement from the Wallace and Gromit barge sequence than anything Tom Cruise has done in Mission Impossible.

do you ever think about "i'm in the house like carpet"

Beef Wellington is just a corn dog from a different socioeconomic background.

I scampered out of the hermit's cave with recluse abandon.

[with dying breath] Tell my wife that I loved…the shareholders

currently hot boxing my car with a steaming rotisserie chicken

Someday I will pursue my dream business, making alternate packets of spice or sauce that you put into your ramen noodles or your boxed mac & cheese.

The most fun thing that can happen to a person is being on a flight where a meal is served 🙌🏻 love it every time

wondering if anyone’s been proposed to with a mouthful of a beefy 5 layer burrito and that “marry me” taco bell sauce packet

i don't think i'm a particularly extravagant person, but i have decided that in 2025, yes, i will have extra guacamole with that burrito, thank you

I can't believe we used to live in a world with three other human species. So freaking cool.

humble bragging looks fun. i wish i sucked enough to be able to be humble

lofi beats to ignore the slow motion apocalypse to

Did you know? Black Friday is named in honor of Rebecca Black, who invented Friday in 2011.

Crash out <<<<
Flip a lid >>>>

Not to be rude, but I feel like jet lag is made up