Andy

Adverts should be representative of traditional British families

What always baffles me when Reform et al trot out this nonsense about adverts - who says the adverts have to be representative of British society? Why? Where does this come from? I assume Reform are equally outraged by talking carrots and babies in leather jackets on motorbikes in adverts.

Hello. It's seems this is your first day on the internet. Literally everyone else immediately noticed this was a satirical joke. Better luck with your next foray into the world wide web.

You think WE haven't been suffering for the last few years? 😂

I'm reading a book about superglue. I can't put it down.

Don't worry. Speaking as a West Ham fan living in Leeds, I think you're guaranteed 3 points tomorrow night

Meanwhile, the BBC continue to scour the streets of Britain looking for members of the public to cheerlead for Farage, full airtime with guff about Prince Andrew that nobody is interested in, and encourage a pile-on of Jess Phillips, all while THIS is going on.

There are seven people in that picture whose ethnic background can be reasonably determined and the majority are white. Not sure the picture makes the point Mike, I mean "the hacker", thinks it makes

I was skimming down my timeline and for a moment I thought you were just showing us the interior of your fridge.

It's like these chumps on Tipping Point have never watched the programme before. It's not hard to work out when to drop the bloody counters to make sure they lie flat, and they all shake their heads like it's bad luck, not their own fuckwittery. (Am I taking this too seriously?) #TippingPoint #ITV

Sweet Jesus

Quite the Freudian slip on ITV News just now when the host mispronounced "Prince Andrew" as "Pimp Andrew"...

Just getting prepped for 7.40 tomorrow morning, there will be no time to waste when I get up

A screenshot from my phone showing the Google Maps directions from my house to the nearest Waitroseses

Please tell me this isn't AI

I really hope that one day, he wakes up and realises that Jesus was 'woke', Christianity is 'woke' and the way he and his ilk behave is more akin to the various "villains" of the New Testament

I do many similar things. If I'm buying a new bag of instant coffee, and there's still some of the old coffee in my coffee tin, I tip it out into a dish, put the new coffee in the tin, and pour the remnants of the old coffee on top. That coffee has been waiting patiently for its moment.

Kind of bold to send $4bn of military assistance to support a man facing an arrest warrant for war crimes following the killing of 60,000 civilians and starvation of countless others - and then expect a peace prize.

I've tumbled out of bed and stumbled to the kitchen, and made myself a cup of freeze-dried, own-brand, instant ambition. It's like proper ambition but without the effort or the satisfying results.

Never trust someone so elitist, pretentious and performatively intellectual that they denigrate both the poor, and anyone who chooses an e-reader over a paper book, despite them containing the same words.

It was poorly worded. What he meant was that Farage's attendance record was ranked 748th out of the 751 MEPs, in other words only 3 people had a worse record than him.

It was badly worded - what he means is that Farage's attendance record was ranked 748th out of 751 MEPs, ie only 3 people had a worse attendance record than he did

He was ranked as having the 748th worst attendance record out of 751 people, the original wording is poor

He was ranked 748 out of 751 people in terms of his attendance, the wording isn't great

There sure seem to be a lot of these 'one rotten apples' getting past Reform's legendary 'robust vetting'. Anyone would think this was in fact EXACTLY the sort of person they want to attract.

Looking forward to the mental gymnastics from Reform supporters who always complain about people in the country illegally, working illegally, they just disappear etc, but who will also want to vehemently oppose Starmer's digital ID card scheme, that will help prevent those very things.

But is he playing the new single by Oswestry Cheese Factory, or Robot Forklift Charging Bay?

Imagine discovering the technology to visit endless alternative timelines so you could see how your life would have played out if you'd made different decisions, only to find that in every single one you turn out to be exactly the same as you actually are.

Me on the way to the rapture