Alan Thorn

Mine and @pup-inferno.bsky.social’s first Folsom was a blast ❤️🖤

😈 SF Folsom 😈

folsom saturday // here we goooo

T̶u̶m̶m̶y̶ (Tylenol doesn’t cause autism) Tuesday

I fear the wet bandits have been accused and convicted of less!

Home Alone 2

cause: husband moons me in the kitchen
effect: ⬇️

my husband is hot— clap IF you care 💅🏻

That works too!

I am also begging for more nights out in Denver 😭🤣

my bb gorl says to keep these cool mornings coming 🍂🍂🍂

see a softie post a softie

(dont think ive showed yall my softie yet, so sorry if its underwhelming 😫)

Absolutely 🤤

it’s that cock-out camp-cooking

- time to cut the hubby’s hair before our trip to the gay campground this weekend -

TS12 in the palm of my hand 🧡

3,000 lbs of sand moved for my birds??

🐓spoiled mothercluckers 🦆

i’m just trying to have four moots standing over me like this 👀

Back to (this bitch that had a lot to say about me the other day in the press) Chicago — what’s good?

How much ass did you want? A whole handful? Done ✅

Sunday scaries in full swing

☀️ here’s some sun on the buns for this monday morning ☀️

a young dad on a tropical vacation or something like that

My 8-year-old self’s letterboxd top 4

unfortunately, it looks like it’s time to retire the pineapple undies

🍑 fuzzy peach 🍑

what riding passenger with my husband does to me 👇🏻

The bounce is unreal 🤤

These photos are gorgeous 🥹🥹

Centipedes scare me lol (love millipedes and all other creepy crawlies though)! And horses have big scary dicks (I also fell off one as a kid, but it’s mostly the dicks 🤣😭)