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Shit Ops Says

@shitopssays.bsky.social

Hilarious shit overheard from burnt-out sysadmins, cloud engineers, "DevOps Engineers", Site Reliability Engineers, Platform Engineers, and whatever dumb job title $TECHCORP cons us into. Formerly on X/Twitter. Warning: swears abound. 🤬

33 Followers  |  1 Following  |  579 Posts  |  Joined: 10.11.2024  |  1.9657

Latest posts by shitopssays.bsky.social on Bluesky

"But about that day, hour, or Unix locale no one knows, not even the engineers in heaven, nor the CISO, but only root, UID 0."

24.09.2025 12:18 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Does the Rapture run on UTC?

24.09.2025 12:16 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

user: how do i get all the aws lambda functions running EOL versions of nodejs?
helpful ai assistant: [source code to terminate-aws-account-and-go-to-the-pub.sh]

19.09.2025 17:03 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

I’m waiting for the first postmortem that says 'oops, I listened to Anthropic and now we don’t have a company anymore'

19.09.2025 17:02 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

grep 'ship$' /usr/share/dict/words | sed 's/ship/shit/g' # you're welcome

18.09.2025 20:46 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

at this point I'm only hearing "leadershit"
very little leading, a whole lot of shit

18.09.2025 20:45 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
Post image 23.08.2025 13:44 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
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🥵

16.05.2025 21:18 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

op1@lappy~$ aprod
perhaps see a therapist
op1@lappy~$

07.05.2025 22:52 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
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we are all oncall-ogists

07.05.2025 22:38 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
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appreciate the honesty

30.04.2025 17:50 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
Post image 16.04.2025 16:00 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Imagine if kubernetes admissions webhook controllers were called pod stems

15.04.2025 14:47 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

The path to good logging is paved with the frustration of being an admin

07.04.2025 08:36 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

FUCK I LOVE STRACE!!!

21.03.2025 02:23 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
Post image 15.02.2025 08:57 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

😭

15.02.2025 01:58 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

FEDRAMP wasn't a suggestion 🔪

15.02.2025 01:37 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

Stay indoors, damn. Never leave. Hoard toilet paper. Buy Kirkland whiskey in 3 liter bottles

14.02.2025 00:08 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

"I'm not bad at this job, this job is bad at me"

13.02.2025 22:43 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

op1: in the case of HTTP-based localhots, just make sure you're giving the right headers

06.02.2025 22:25 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

eng1: I mean, I'd settle for a "get your crown chakra out of your root chakra" plan

06.02.2025 21:46 — 👍 2    🔁 2    💬 0    📌 0

eng1: dear self, it's localhost, not localhots
eng1: very different, not work appropriate

06.02.2025 21:38 — 👍 3    🔁 1    💬 1    📌 0
Post image 10.01.2025 04:25 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Hahahaha it's always a Jenkins box

07.01.2025 01:54 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
Post image 06.01.2025 22:22 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
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WE HAVE AI-POWERED GARBAGE TRUCKS, LET'S LAY OFF ALL THE SANITATION WORKERS

03.01.2025 01:30 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Wait.

Someone, somewhere, approved pushing a software update to live on December 24th?

Is that even legal? It seems like it should be a crime. It's definitely a moral offense. It's very nearly a sin against God.

26.12.2024 04:58 — 👍 115    🔁 3    💬 2    📌 0
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really now

21.12.2024 05:34 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Aligning my chanclas🩴

14.12.2024 07:05 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

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