Andrew Bohrer

They are basically paying you

Reggie Dinkins is filling that void with this mid east war that 30 Rock did with that last war.

Never forget who you’re fighting for.

Time is a flat circle

Let em know a coat of paint helps

Only a hack would make a documentary based on google query data. But I’d watch that doc.

Mine was different as I was not on my phone and several people could see that I was the stupid haole who was lost.

Puttering out here, but I guess, don’t phone and drive, support free no strings housing, and drive slowly in Hawai’i— they put parks everywhere.

Granted, I’m not perfect, the last time I drove on a sidewalk I took a wrong turn on a cutaway curb and *very slowly* drove through a city park.

I couldn’t turn around because the person behind me had done the same thing.

Which, insults to my clothes aside, she was probably right.

We might be so deep into a mental health and housing crisis that you can’t yell at someone to not drive on the sidewalk because they think you are the weird one.

I told my wife how it was so odd she didn’t look up, I am very large and very loud. My wife said,

“She may have just thought you were someone in crisis and didn’t want to make eye contact.”

I yelled, she didn’t look up, I yelled louder and she just rolled her rear wheels over the curb, still not looking up, on her phone, left turn into traffic.

Yesterday, I yelled at a person driving on the sidewalk.

She was leaving the post office, I was walking in, she was looking at her phone, thus not knowing she was on the sidewalk.

Have you guys seen that show starring Jon Hamm as a minor league baseball coach in 1983 Langley Virginia set against backdrop of the Iran Contra Affair?

If you haven’t, but want to, I may have a screenplay and a star attached.

If Lovecraft were alive today, he would not be offended by this.

Mostly because he wouldn’t see it because he’d be only be on Twitter

You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself get a residency at Sphere

Australian snack food makers be like “that one weird shape, it’s Tassie.”

Guys, I’m writing a book called

“The Secret to Happiness is sending $20 to Andrew Bohrer.”

Gotta tame the AI bronco.

It sounded familiar because everything that they cited was somebody who had reposted a chapter from John Hodgeman‘s 2005 book the area of my expertise, a book that I read 20 years ago.

It was from a chapter titled “700 hobo names“

I thought that this was AI pulling some interesting things from odd sources around the Internet, but I didn’t trust those sources so I dug one step (click) deeper because it sounded familiar.

Hobo names:

Comedy writing for museum goers with AI anxiety. I feel seen.

Shoutout to the UK for arresting people who do crimes.

I did the rewatch a couple years back out of love and and conversation/ argument about what cinema still matters.

Interested to hear your ex post facto.

Absolute Batman is out here fighting biblically accurate angels and nobody is talking about it.

Fucking champion.

I knew I wasn't good enough. I am only 5 raccoons

These Seattleites shed ‘tears of pride’ during the Super Bowl halftime show Seattle may not have the Boricua community of places like New York or Orlando. But many of the 24,000 people here of Puerto Rican descent relished the Super Bowl halftime show, Naomi Ishisaka writes.

This week's column: Yes, the Seahawks won the biggest prize in U.S. professional sports and sparked a week of giddy celebration in the city, but for many in the region, Benito Antonio Martínez Ocasio’s Super Bowl halftime show was just as significant.

But like, the answer might take a while.

A young coworker asked me, on my last day, if I had any advice for them.

I said some sage shit or whatever, but what I should have said was:

“The nicest thing you can do is ask an old timer a question.”

The Attack on Titan pilot episode is so different from the rest of the series.