Don't look to me for leadership. Sometimes I let YouTube ads play until the end because I feel bad for them.
08.10.2025 23:03 β π 44 π 7 π¬ 0 π 0@lizhackett.bsky.social
Screenwriter. Toast eater. Enjoys polite revenge.
Don't look to me for leadership. Sometimes I let YouTube ads play until the end because I feel bad for them.
08.10.2025 23:03 β π 44 π 7 π¬ 0 π 0I like feeling a little bit dumb sometimes. It means there's something really interesting to learn.
06.10.2025 21:21 β π 26 π 1 π¬ 1 π 0I got new reading glasses at the store and as they gently tried to bag them I said, "Don't worry. I'm just gonna sit on them in 3 days."
06.10.2025 02:03 β π 60 π 3 π¬ 1 π 0She wasn't much to look at. Her eyes were small, chin too big, eyebrows too pale. Oh, but to see her parallel par--to see her par--nope, crank it--I said CRANK--no, OTHER way--keep cranking--how did you pass a driving test?--curb--CURB. Jesus, finally. Oh, but to see her parallel park.
14.08.2025 23:58 β π 42 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0I have zero natural musical talent but Iβm writing a song about driving in L.A. Itβs called βShithead In A Tesla On My Ass.β
15.03.2025 20:16 β π 96 π 9 π¬ 11 π 2This Friday's a full moon and total lunar eclipse. Any other ladies over this shit want to meet up at that weird pulsating stone circle that appeared in the Kroger parking lot and combine powers? I'll bring a spinach dip.
12.03.2025 18:55 β π 134 π 8 π¬ 4 π 1La Dolce Villa is #1 globally on @netflix.com for the second week in a row! So proud of our movie.
26.02.2025 00:50 β π 30 π 0 π¬ 3 π 1This Saturday the 22nd on @hallmark.bsky.social, SISTERHOOD, INC., written by me and Hilary Galanoy. Below is a tiny sneak preview!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=85kB...
Thank you!!! It was so good to see her in NYC!
19.02.2025 17:25 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Thank you! He's just a lovely person.
18.02.2025 20:17 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0La Dolce Villa is #1 globally on @netflix.com! Thank you to all who have watched. Let's all go in on a villa together!
18.02.2025 20:08 β π 27 π 0 π¬ 4 π 0La Dolce Villa is currently #1 on Netflix! Thank you to all who have watched!
14.02.2025 17:49 β π 43 π 2 π¬ 8 π 5It's not every day your names are on a billboard in Times Square! La Dolce Villa, coming to Netflix this Thursday, 2/13!!
11.02.2025 21:07 β π 181 π 6 π¬ 8 π 0The air quality index in L.A. right now is "You smoked one, so Dad made you smoke the whole pack."
23.01.2025 19:13 β π 51 π 2 π¬ 0 π 0February 13th!
22.01.2025 16:45 β π 21 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0ME: Happy New Year, Dad. We love you.
DAD: That's great. Hey, put the dog back on the phone. I got another joke for him.
I went to a Trader Joe's on New Year's Eve and the parking lot was like the first 20 minutes of Saving Private Ryan.
01.01.2025 00:30 β π 279 π 28 π¬ 9 π 2Whooo! Happy NYE, beloved!
31.12.2024 23:34 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0All right, 2024. Call your mom to come pick you up.
31.12.2024 18:56 β π 60 π 6 π¬ 1 π 0I said to my husband, "I don't want to be on the freeway with all the New Year's drunks." And in that moment, the progress bar on my transformation into my dad reached 100%.
31.12.2024 01:06 β π 345 π 21 π¬ 9 π 1If multiple women sit separately in a food court, each quietly eating a salad, do not interrupt us. We are silently communicating through salads, like whale song.
27.12.2024 21:56 β π 3672 π 239 π¬ 84 π 18ANDREW NELSON! Good lord, the world is back on track. Hello!
17.12.2024 05:53 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0We have a premiere date! LA DOLCE VILLA, co-written by me & Hilary Galanoy, will start streaming on Netflix Feb 13th. We're proud of this beautiful movie, and I even included my favorite story from my parents' first date.
A few first look photos in the meantime...
Unless a sweating Slavic woman with safety pins in her mouth and a thousand curses under her breath didn't properly fit you, you're wearing the wrong sized bra.
13.12.2024 21:08 β π 388 π 29 π¬ 23 π 2Sorry I put aviator sunglasses on the baby Jesus in your nativity scene and started singing βHighway to the manger zone.β
10.12.2024 13:24 β π 23822 π 2476 π¬ 427 π 151every day I understand a little more why Arya Stark kept that list
03.12.2024 23:08 β π 13490 π 1611 π¬ 276 π 108It's Friday the 13th during Mercury in Retrograde, which means it's a terrible time to sign the lease on that lakeside cabin
13.12.2024 15:45 β π 162 π 18 π¬ 5 π 3Sorry I pretended I was drowning so you could see how incredible my hair looked underwater.
16.11.2024 01:09 β π 380 π 48 π¬ 6 π 1I'll host a Christmas party but only if a torrid secret emerges to jeopardize the serenity of our modest suburban street.
13.12.2024 20:48 β π 59 π 5 π¬ 2 π 0