Ophelia Rose

And that’s just the ripple effect that we faced at a public level. That doesn’t even begin to touch the atrocities that so many were subjected to at the hands of these horrible people, including the fucking president. This entire country is so beyond fucked.

And now we’re adults and all this demented shit is unraveling and -despite all that- many of us still can’t break away from the idea that if we don’t adhere to these pedophilic beauty standards that we’re nothing because we’re brainwashed and it’s so deeply fucking sickening.

What this really boils down to is that these horrifyingly powerful perverts were able to design and orchestrate an entire culture that had almost every child in the country unwittingly engaging in their fetish. This is possibly the largest sexual violation in the history of the world.

Our entire culture builds up this idea that women are only valuable if they look like children because -wealthy men with disgusting paraphilias- have dictated the rules for the better part of the last 20 years. They manipulated culture to suit their sick fetish for abuse.

So now I’m 32. My metabolism is slower, I have a belly, I have body and facial hair, I have fine lines between my brows. I’m growing into my age and I’ve been conditioned my entire life to believe that reaching this point is merely the beginning of the end.

Like okay, I was taught from my lived childhood experience that my body was an object to be used by men. Then I went on to grow up in a culture that more or less reaffirmed this unconsciously because of creeps who get off on the kind of abuse that shaped me.

Late night thoughts about trauma and the Epstein files:
So realizing that the beauty standards I’ve wrestled with my entire life have been dictated by wealthy pedophiles is upsetting. This paired with being a victim of childhood SA is doubly challenging.

It’s pure synchronicity, and it reminds me of how present Hekate really is in my life. Whenever I find myself doubting or questioning my work, this practice reminds me that the work is real and vital.

Currently my Deipnon practice consists of a ritual to call Hekate, a personal working of magic, and then reading a chapter of Entering Hekate’s Cave.
It is absolutely bananas how every month the chapter I read is shockingly relevant to the internal processes I’m going through.

That said, though, I think the resets are a good reminder of what’s working. What do I keep up with, and what can I let go of to make room for practices that will stick.
I know I have weekly practices that I can maintain. Daily is another beast.

After initiating into my old coven I’m realizing that in my personal practice it’s vital that I hit another reset.
It’s almost disheartening, because I feel like this reset is something I find myself coming back to over and over again.

Weirdly enough tho I am all about clowning with these kids today.

Phentermine got me dizzy at work.

So now I need to unlearn this idea that my support needs are too much but how do I even begin to unpack that

Long story short I’ve developed a fear of asking for more than a certain threshold of support from others because I am afraid it will destroy my relationships with them or gravely, devastatingly worse things I don’t dare mention.

Realized something was a lot more traumatic than I had previously acknowledged lol lmao hahaha

Somebody tell Raven to let me get 10 quail.

But anyway yeah I’ve been doing a think about feminist theology. Not converting to Christianity or anything like that, but I do think the central message of this Gospel is very compelling. 5/5

What exactly was the Gospel, and how could someone earnestly spread that Gospel in the modern era?
Christianity is a shadow of what it was meant to be, and I just think that’s such a shame. I do think some folks uphold those real values, but they’re a minority of Christians today. 4/

When the Bible was pieced together, it was extremely removed from the original teachings of Jesus.
Further, it became an institutionalized faith structure. The very thing Jesus instructed the apostles to not let happen. At least according to the Gospel of Mary.
It just really has me wondering 3/

The Gospel, back then, wasn’t a collection of books bound together as the Bible we understand today. The Gospel was a collection of parables, apocalypse, an stories about the life of Jesus. They were oral traditions that inevitably got warped over time. And this happened to such a degree that 2/

Reading about the Gospel of Mary and I’m having some thoughts:
So much of the text is about recognizing the inherent goodness of the soul, the immaterial nature of the soul and eternity, and the rejection of mortal institutions. All while being meant to spread the Gospel.
All that being said, 1/

Sick of being sick. ;;

Dedicated into my coven. ✨ This weekend has been a whirlwind and I am so grateful for these women.

Yes absolutely!

That’s exactly how I felt, but this is my all time favorite series.

Shocking that a terminally online 20-something thinks I’m a naive idiot because I don’t subscribe to black and white thinking.
I’ve never felt more old lmao

Can’t believe Aldi had cotton candy grapes.
I am so happy ;w;

I’m getting the boots I’ve wanted for literal MONTHS a blessed Imbolc to meeeee