ITS CALLED WAR PROFITEERING BAYBAYYYYY
04.03.2026 15:22 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0was watching my ex husband try to put new trucks on our kids tech deck and after like five minutes of dropping screws i had to say βdude how did you even get me pregnantβ
04.03.2026 15:22 β π 4 π 0 π¬ 3 π 0Im gonna buy it and raise the price
04.03.2026 15:19 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0your adulthood sled
04.03.2026 15:18 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0colonel mustard!
04.03.2026 15:18 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0ngl i thought it was βorangutangβ until like 6 years ago
04.03.2026 15:13 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0if i say i did something 3 weeks ago itβs safe to assume i meant yesterday
04.03.2026 03:46 β π 64 π 28 π¬ 3 π 1rosebud was the name of the housekeeper he murdered
04.03.2026 15:12 β π 10 π 0 π¬ 2 π 0This is day 3 of them knocking out half the city. If Allegheny County communications had a well setup operation, you can triangulate that in minutes. However this has exposed a massive security gap. They have no plan.
04.03.2026 14:19 β π 14 π 1 π¬ 1 π 0i need a wall-sized map with pins in every active volcano
04.03.2026 14:48 β π 7 π 1 π¬ 0 π 0
me: why didnβt Ariel just write a note to the Prince after she lost her voice to let him know what Ursula did to her? i mean she signed the contract so we know she can write
pharmacist: i meant questions about the medication
nobody even writes little ditties about jackin diane anymore
04.03.2026 14:41 β π 20 π 2 π¬ 3 π 0
Me: Let me make this really important phone call.
Body: Let's do it with a weird bubble in your throat, yeah?
let us not speak about how powerful a community could be if it were not for landlords and airbnb owners
04.03.2026 01:48 β π 13 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0youβre not a savvy entrepreneur, youβre a dipshit who takes away from people owning homes in a community, hope this helps, enjoy the gulag
04.03.2026 01:47 β π 3 π 2 π¬ 0 π 0cru for president, we have a guillotine for landlords.
04.03.2026 01:46 β π 8 π 2 π¬ 1 π 0I donβt check my emails. Let fame find me at my door.
04.03.2026 00:35 β π 11 π 6 π¬ 0 π 0Sorry I invited you over for a romantic dinner then fed you Beef-A-Roni and unfrosted Pop Tarts.
26.02.2026 02:45 β π 182 π 67 π¬ 19 π 1okay Iβm gonna get canceled for being the only person who likes unfrosted pop tarts
04.03.2026 01:31 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0[Me at my second rodeo] listen here, you ignorant piece of shit
04.03.2026 01:21 β π 39 π 12 π¬ 0 π 0Much like a succulent, I too thrive on neglect.
04.03.2026 00:50 β π 68 π 25 π¬ 1 π 0boy, are you a seagull because i want to fight you in a parking lot for the last hot dog
04.03.2026 00:48 β π 219 π 61 π¬ 8 π 0I STILL highly contend most of these people are on the registry and canβt be near schools
04.03.2026 01:22 β π 4 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0YOU MIGHT BE AN ICE AGENT IF you were turned down for every other form of service bc youβre a fucking nonce
04.03.2026 01:21 β π 7 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0the first rule of ICE agent club is your dad never said he was proud of you
04.03.2026 01:19 β π 34 π 6 π¬ 0 π 0YOU MIGHT BE AN ICE AGENT IF your wife has absolutely pegged you on your wedding night (Iβm not shaming, itβs just clear that they love anal pleasures and are pretending they donβt)
04.03.2026 01:18 β π 4 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0
YOU MIGHT BE AN ICE AGENT IF
you believe strongly in America but donβt abide by constitutional rights because you think youβre special even tho everyone here except for natives are immigrants lmao fuckin dipshit
YOU MIGHT BE AN ICE AGENT IF you bought your uniform on Amazon and still havenβt gotten paid lmao fuckaas bitch
04.03.2026 01:15 β π 12 π 2 π¬ 1 π 0
YOUUUUUU MIGHT BE AN ICE AGENT IF
you had a d average in school and didnβt pass the presidential fitness exam and made a hit list and got kicked out of school