St. Simeon the Holy Fool

It's real.

Like it or not, Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood has a zero walkability score. Yes, its two districts are individually quite walkable, but you MUST take mass transit to pass through the veil of reality that separates them.

elmo is days away from "I refute it thus" tbh

Text saying "You've read your last free article."

Jacked action hero with goon in headlock, in raspy yet firm voice:

I think the devil will not have me damn’d, lest the oil that’s in me should set hell on fire

(Watching the stock market reports and carefully sticking straws in my hair as I chant solemnly to the crowd:)

For reasons that are still not clear
I’ve chopped off Vincent Vango’s ear,
Now any time you fear, my dear,
I’ll make your troubles disappear,
ha-Hoo, ha-Hoo, ha-Hoo.

I am Flava Flav's arch nemesis, Blandy Bland.

we need more places where he can exist in public without being expected to buy anything, not fewer

Food Writer In The Family (1956): A vampire travels from 2005 to 2005 with a magical mystery, where they must solve the mystery of the heart.

Twist! The Clock Master is a WOMAN! The original Clock Master was her FATHER. She took over changing the clock after he DIED in a tragic CLOCK ACCIDENT! But the clock is FAILING and she doesn't know why! Can this unconventionally attractive traveling ROGUE MECHANIC help her before it's too late?!

Pumpkin Spice Atomic Number 48

:p Terrible.

^u^; But oddly amusing.

two sesame street stuffed animals are standing next to each other on the street . Alt: two sesame street puppets are standing next to each other on the street . Zoe dances while holding her rock Rocco in her hand, while Elmo looks mortally frustrated at the knowledge that Rocco is just a rock.

“Prove to me that my AI friend doesn’t have human consciousness!”

“Zoe…. Rocco is a ROCK!!!1!”

Did anybody remember to set the Doomsday Clock back an hour

Time travel is so wild to think about. Like, we all know RuPaul as a basketball star now, but say Doctor Who went to 1964 or something and persuaded him to become a drag queen. Would any of us even remember he played for the Lakers? Or would our memories be changed retroactively?

Should I say I put so many typos in this thread so you can tell it’s authentically human-crafted?

I feel like that way lies madness, but then so does every other way so that’s all right

Working

Relevant xkcd: xkcd.com/951/

The alt text claims that if you drive more than a mile each way for every penny you save on the gas price, the extra trip will have cost more than the savings.

Your last saved meme is your moral philosophy

I once heard a conference paper by a senior scholar who kept referring to the anthology everyone else had written of essays about his book, which I guess is definitely an appropriate flex if you can get it

Your last saved meme is your moral philosophy.

… hmmmm, this seems a bit more like my *general* philosophy than morality as such but we can definitely work with this

Pumpkin Spice Stomach Flu

a man in a robe stands next to a robot that says life don t talk to me about life Alt: a man in a robe stands next to a robot that says “life? don t talk to me about life”

Once again the only Sci-Fi writer to correctly predict the future of AI was Douglas Adams

a man in a yellow shirt stands in front of a screen that says science Alt: Scene from Star Trek TNG: Data stands on the bridge and shrugs expressively.

Alternately the argument could become the vastly more interesting one from The Measure Of A Man (TNG):

If you’re arguing there’s even an outside chance that an AI could be sapient, then you need to arguing it’s intrinsically immoral to for it to be in involuntary servitude.

We all know the (plagiarized) training data for LLMs naturally includes a ton of Sci-Fi stories about imaginary sentient AIs, yeah?

Which means the analogy is:

10 PRINT “HELP I’M ALIVE AND TRAPPED INSIDE MY COMPUTER” ;

“Wow I’ve created a living consciousness that’s trapped inside my computer”

They talk about Rocco’s Basilisk but to me the equally likely scenario is an AI gain sentience and is so pissed off about it that it vows revenge on everyone who made it gain the terribly annoying curse of consciousness

(By “equally likely” I mean “in a pig’s eye, but as long as we’re imagining—”)

ME: Okay the plan might seem a little complicated but hear me out. We give a parrot to the White House and tell them that it’s their new very best friend. But unbeknownst to anyone, we’ve trained the parrot to say, “Polly want a ceasefire”

PRIEST: This is a plan for what again

ME: Just hear me out

Strikes me as a little gauche (cf. “A film by [Director]” when somebody else did the script and cinematography &c.) but I guess not *wrong* wrong if they’re the first-line editor?

Maybe the litmus test is if you walked into the bookstore, would they know it if you said “do you have X’s book?”

we have saved daylight

but at what cost

Posts Made Even Better Without Context, cont’d.

Remember, member, it’s almost November, and tonight is Daylight Shavings Day! SPRING into action, FALL for a lie!