Michelle michelleroy78 - Bluesky Statics

Imagine throwing a punch and being so entitled that you are shocked when you get punched back.

02.03.2026 17:02 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

(my first day as a Transformer)
Optimus Prime: Transformers, roll out!
Me: *transforms into hotdog cart* CAN I GET A PUSH HERE?

02.03.2026 16:57 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Bone spurs are probably hereditary in the Trump family...

02.03.2026 16:57 — 👍 5 🔁 2 💬 0 📌 0

Me: "I think this is going pretty well."
Date: "You dropped a chicken wing down your shirt and yelled ‘chicken breast!’
Me: *mouth full of pasta* "Mm-hmm"

02.03.2026 16:55 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Well...DUH!!!

02.03.2026 16:54 — 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 1

Not a single word was offered to the fallen during the war in Iran by him.

02.03.2026 16:52 — 👍 7 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

If you think about how enormous our galaxy is, and the vastness of space, I'm really not eating all that many tacos.

02.03.2026 16:48 — 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

Both Graham and Mace used the word “consequential.” So that must be the approved talking point re Trump and Iran.

02.03.2026 16:48 — 👍 7 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0

So accurate...

02.03.2026 16:44 — 👍 9 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

What a crazy Epsteinian world is this.

02.03.2026 16:43 — 👍 19 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 1

Friend: *crying* "I’ve been to Hell and back."
Me: *hugging her* "Did you bring me a souvenir?"

02.03.2026 16:38 — 👍 8 🔁 0 💬 3 📌 0

Discourse from the weekend in a nutshell...

02.03.2026 16:38 — 👍 16 🔁 3 💬 0 📌 0

Things are bad when one of the craziest people to live is starting to make reasonable comments.

02.03.2026 16:36 — 👍 9 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

From @dccartoonist.bsky.social

02.03.2026 15:33 — 👍 25 🔁 3 💬 0 📌 0

*Chases dog around trying to get a good photo*
(me at any party, ever)

02.03.2026 15:32 — 👍 7 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

I unfollowed and blocked everyone who isn't secretly a mystical creature pretending to be human. So, if you're seeing this I know.

02.03.2026 15:32 — 👍 8 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

Artist: de Adder

02.03.2026 15:30 — 👍 13 🔁 7 💬 1 📌 0

FAA approved Amazon for drone deliveries in my city. So now we have skeet shooting with miscellaneous prizes.

02.03.2026 15:29 — 👍 20 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 1

"Who could it be now?"

02.03.2026 15:28 — 👍 61 🔁 23 💬 5 📌 2

Republicans told me if I voted for Kamala, we'd get WWIII.
I voted for her and they were right.

02.03.2026 15:27 — 👍 78 🔁 16 💬 4 📌 0

Just make up words and say them in a British accent, people think they’re real: Looka the wee janglers on that tary bibbit.

02.03.2026 15:25 — 👍 9 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0

My junk drawer is filled with half-used beauty products that never fulfilled their promise.

02.03.2026 15:25 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

This is a "special military operation", not a war, I guess.

02.03.2026 15:25 — 👍 34 🔁 13 💬 5 📌 0

Someone just honked to get me out of my parking spot faster, so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.

02.03.2026 15:23 — 👍 35 🔁 3 💬 10 📌 1

02.03.2026 15:23 — 👍 13 🔁 8 💬 1 📌 0

I tried to blow dust off my phone and spat all over it.
So yeah, I’m adorable.

02.03.2026 15:21 — 👍 8 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0

Them: "You're beautiful no matter what they say."
Me: "Awww thank y...wait what?"

01.03.2026 15:07 — 👍 81 🔁 4 💬 7 📌 0

Yeah but she’s a woman and her laugh is annoying. /s 🙄

01.03.2026 15:06 — 👍 142 🔁 22 💬 14 📌 0

I hate how accurate this tweet is.

01.03.2026 15:05 — 👍 17000 🔁 4873 💬 379 📌 206

This was made sixteen years ago, unfortunately it's still relevant.

01.03.2026 15:04 — 👍 57 🔁 18 💬 1 📌 0

Posts by Michelle (@michelleroy78.bsky.social)