Michelle

Heard this today: "This is YOUR life and you're letting people make you unhappy?"
And I felt that in my soul.

U.S. Tomahawk Hit Naval Base Beside Iranian School, Video Shows

U.S. Tomahawk Hit Naval Base Beside Iranian School, Video Shows www.nytimes.com/2026/03/08/w...

Everybody has abs, but normal people keep them covered with a healthy layer of chicken nuggies.

He started the war. He killed innocent schoolgirls. Now he wants to make it look like he's some sort of good guy.

Putting on my summer clothes for the first warm day of the year after winter feedings and seeing no sunlight for 5 months.

When is she not lying? Anyone who still buys this deserves to be publicly admonished as an idiot.

To be fair, nobody looked at the nazis and said "let's stop them" up until they had already invaded and conquered half of Europe. But yeah, I think it's a pretty good comparison.

We really used to print out 4 pages from MapQuest and travel like pirates.

Whoever has my voodoo doll, please put it on a treadmill.

“I am so sick of LGBT people making that their entire personality!”

Instead of texting "I'm here", last night one of my friends knocked on my door like our ancestors used to do.

Vast majority of veterans and active duty voted for him. Where’s your fucking dignity? He genuinely hates you.

Artist: Clay Jones @claytoonz.com

The world is on fire right now because of him, but he’s not going to let that ruin his golf weekend.

Take out the 80-year-old and replace him with a younger, even worse family member. Unfuckingbelievable.

Everyone compliments you on your jumpsuit until you have to go to the lady's room and then it's just you and your bad choices.

One thing about me is that if I have exactly 1.75 drinks, I'm gonna send silly texts and I can't be held responsible for that.

We only have one day set aside to celebrate women.
Sharks get a whole week.
Clearly, we need to start eating more people.

Great minds think alike.

Fox News has now totally removed Trump wearing his campaign merch from their footage of the Dignified Transfer ceremonies.

Even Fox News was so embarrassed by Trump wearing his campaign merch to the Dignified Transfer service that they used a clip from December 17, 2025.

Yeah...that's probably me.

Them: "Have you tried dieting?"
Me: "Have you ever even TRIED pizza?

I didn’t even know buses could go this fast.

Why is Trump shown sweating the decision? Ah, I see, he can only pick one.

When you see a dead person in a movie, do you try to catch them breathing too or am I a weirdo?

Burning taxpayer money instead of spending it on people's health.

I know it’s time to clean out my purse when my car assumes it’s a second passenger who’s not wearing their seatbelt.

Named 38k times? There should be at least one arrest, right?

The Fox News State regime media/propaganda machine in full swing...