Jon Phillips

Ok, this robot, and *only* this robot, gets to live

Proud papa moment: my son J published a letter in the @nytimes.com today (in print tomorrow) on the need to think our definitions of autism.

If it were me, I would not post videos celebrating my literally-weapons-grade gastrointestinal distress

Y’all here is a fun fact: Portland has a brand new volunteer organization called “operation inflation” that allows people to borrow inflatable costumes for protests. They just started a couple weeks ago and have like a 160 costume library (and counting because people keep donating).

Do you think I’d explain my masterstroke if there remained the slightest chance of you affecting its outcome? I made the NYPD woke 35 minutes ago.

The second photo includes my first apartment in Baltimore, seeing St. Paul complete devoid of cars is beautiful

shohei's 10 strikeouts and moonshot home run distances were really just for style points. short of pitching a complete game he completely maxed out all channels through which he could deliver objective value, so he poured his leftover brilliance into knocking out side quests. it seems impossible

the declaration of independence is cringe.

so is the gettysburg address.

FDR’s four freedoms: also cringe.

ditto king’s “dream” speech.

ditto LBJ declaring, as president, “we shall overcome”

cringe, for lack of a better word, is good.

irony is a luxury. it’s a reflection of decadence.

thinking about the guy running the us govt bluesky accounts. thats his friday, trying to troll people on a relatively niche social media site because they won twitter and it made them miserable. catastrophic loser energy

It's ok, the Ms have a plan. Right?

Until there are more Lady Hardcastle mysteries, I'm looking for a new cozy series that is funny and smart and historical. Who's got recs?

Everything she writes is so good. She has an epic fantasy of manners in which exactly one act of violence takes place, off "camera", in over 1,000 pages. Just incredible writing. And the Stargazy Pie series is so much fun

This might or might not immediately sound up your alley, but try the Greenwing and Dart series by Victoria Goddard, starting with Stargazy Pie

Shohei knoheis

I assume this guy is fairly identifiable

It worked, bookies, if you wish to engage my services for games 6 or 7, my dms are open

Eugenio Suarez

The Mariners have won their first home game in the ALCS since October 15, 2000

LFGGGGGGG

lmao

need a richter scale reading for this

Fair enough. Next time!

MARINERS

Mariners are just all about the ✨🔱drama🔱✨

Yes!! But I loved the subsequent callout—"Geno was trying to hit that ball all the way to the Niehaus statue" 💙💚

But it hurts to not have Niehaus calling it...

Hahahahahahahahaha that was a partial karmic payback for that goddamn fucking mid-doubleheader trade

Apologies, I know most of you didn't follow me for baseball content, but for the duration of the ALCS (and fingers crossed, the Series) this is a Mariners Appreciation Account

Is it really a Mariners grand slam without Dave Niehaus?

The vibes? FUCKIN IMMACULATE

GET OUT THE RYE BREAD AND MUSTARD IT'S GRAND SALAMI TIME

The Bread Carrier, by Pablo Picasso, 1905