skoof!

life is easier when you Take a Nap

the weather is turning chilly and I'm feeling this... deep-seated instinct to consume more calories and to prepare a warm, safe place to lay down for a long time...

...has the petplay gone too far, or not far enough...? 🤔

It's getting colder outside which means it may be time for me to prepare to hibernate...

the world is a happier place when you're wearing your collar

Quiet coyoooooote!!!!

oh my gosh it's surreal to see this finally up and public! congrats to you and the team <3

they are *plotting!!!!*

alas I wouldn't be on whatsapp is I had another option... :c

aaaaaa Facebook is so scary, why does it read my WhatsApp contacts then recommend them as Facebook friends!! No!!! Don't do that!!!

this is just my home, nothing to worry about here I promise! would you like to come in?

Y'ALL SHE FOUND A BOAT!!!

pet tip: make sure you wear your collars, little ones!

SHE IS SO WELL READ!!

How can you give that up?

Just a few more days. Surely someone will come in a few more days.

Just a few more days, you tell yourself. And then maybe you'll decide to stop.

If you stop taking the pills, maybe you'll stop wanting this. The thought terrifies you. You've spent so long learning what it is to cope with the urges, to see the beauty in giving in, to train yourself to be perfect and desired and *owned.*

You want to live with someone who will be the center of your life, holding that sweet leash around your mind and keeping you nice and dosed up on the chemical.

But not like that. You want to be a happy pet. Beloved, taken care of, doted on, like you see all around you every time you log on to chat with your friends.

At the same time, you feel more distant from the people in your professional life. Unless they know what the drug feels like, they will never understand.

They're out there finding love. They're happy. You want to be happy.

You aren't sure if you want it to stop. This has become a part of you now. All of your closest friends are pets. You feel more seen and more understood than any time in your life.

If you stopped, this all might go away.

Or it might not.

This is the intended effect of the medication: to make you desperate, submissive, to erode away your will so that the will of another can take over.

You've long since grown accustomed to the tearful nights where you've cried yourself to sleep, hormone-crazed body pleading desperately to belong, to be touched, to be desired.

You've been taking your medicine every day for a year, now. You look at the bottle on your nightstand and wonder "should I stop?"

Your other pet friends help a little. They know what the cravings are like and they can do a little bit to sate them. A few words of affirmation here, a bit of teasing and praise there. It's not near enough, but it's what you can get, right now.

So you get by on scraps. Your urges are getting stronger, and so are the side effects. Mood swings, brain fog, depression. Doctors have no way to detect anything is wrong with you, and you don't plan on explaining your new habit to them. So you manage. You cope.

Finally, you can rest, just like you've always wanted.

It has to be special, you think. It can't just be someone random. If you're going to do this, it has to be with the right person, and the right person hasn't come along yet.

But there's a part of you that doesn't want that. There's a part of you that's hoping for your Cinderella story, where you meet your one-and-only and suddenly your whole world lights up. Where suddenly, you don't have to work anymore. You don't have to fight anymore.

They flock to forums and profess their desperate need to be owned, to be controlled, to never again feel the terror that comes with living their lives on their own terms.

You feel the need gnawing at you every day, like a hollowness in your heart. You think about how easy it would be to go on the internet and beg, like you've seen so many others do.

But not you. You keep working the same day job you've been working for years. It pays well enough, better than almost any pet you know. You separate the life you had before and the life you have now, giving in to your urges only when you're at home, alone.