vivian 🏳️‍⚧️ 🪽

ive got to jerk off while I stare into someone’s eyes like a deer in headlights

i need to be held please gosh anyone please

lowkey need someone to dose me with drugs i shouldn’t be on and stir advantage of me

im just a deer but literally like wtf is my luck

who want the deer ><

GOD MY LIFE FUCKING SUCKS HOLY SHIT

i need someone to beat the shit out of me

i kind of want to hide up in a ball and pretend i don’t exist. i kinda feel awful

the oblivion resurgence is saving me

i don’t think i want to exist

maybe iam plushy

im not a plushie,,

soo pretty

don’t flash your headlights at me i’ll freeze and start cumming

lesbianism is crazy cuz one day you’ll be talking to a girl n the next day she’s ur mom

im deer :>

im the most fucked up deer ever

Cough Coughing Menomena · I Am the Fun Blame Monster! (Plus Nine B-Sides) · Song · 2003

open.spotify.com/track/5hbfiu...

i lied im totally going to die in the next 4 months lmfao

aha i mean im ok and normal

im just going to go to sleep and wake up in an hour and go to work and then after work i’ll come home and think about how i can’t take living anymore. if i died i think it would genuinely cause my mom to die too and that’s so sickening but god i can’t take this anymore i can’t take this life its bad

i am going to be working until i die so i might as well get it over with sooner than deal with a life of suffering. i’ve been alive 19 years almost 20 and all i’ve had is trauma and abuse with maybe a solid month or two of being happy and living a good life

the person who abused me so horribly bad and ruined my way of thinking is dead and i will never get an apology or anything. the closure of the torture i went through for 19 years is nothing. i don’t get how something can be so unfair. i don’t understand how life is supposed to get better.

im sorry guys. i just can’t see a meaning or a reason to go on. i feel like my head is broken. im a tired mess and my bpd has been absolutely fucking ruthless recently. my emotions are constantly flying up and down and i don’t know how to pretend that i’m normal anymore. i want to give up badly.

i think it’s a good 45% chance i make it to my birthday alive this year

i still want to die but i’m not as catastrophic anymore someone please talke to me

my country is a mess. my life is in shambles. my brain is against me i honestly am not sure what i am alive for. i want to die so bad and i have not felt so scared that i’m going to actually do it in so long i hate it so much. im so deressed and i can’t reach out to anyone and im alone and im scared