nefoli.bsky.social

Time for Joke:
- Why couldn't the crocodile clone his plants?
- Because he's not a proper gator

Time for Joke:
- My internet connection is a lot like my grandad
- It's down most of the time, and even when it's up, it's shaky as hell and we all know it's gonna go down again soon

Time for Joke:
- What do the colors green, pink, and yellow have in common?
- The phone rings green....green.....green! So you pink it up and say yellow.

Time for Joke:
- What do you call a goat that works at a bakery?
- A battering ram

Time for Joke:
- What animal is always at a game of cricket?
- A bat.

Time for Joke:
- Life is like huffing butane...
- first you huff the butane, then you die

Time for Joke:
- Thought I heard someone say “Hello” in Arabic
- But it was a false Salaam

Time for Joke:
- To Boldly Go...
- “My friend had a disastrous date last night... apparently the guy was into giving golden showers. He was a big actor, too, one of the Star Trek guys.”“Shatner??”“No, I think she left before he could get to that.”

Time for Joke:
- Happened IRL We were at the cemetery. Talking about a dead person who got cremated. My dad said: I don't want to hear about you doing this to me!
- I answered: You won't...

Time for Joke:
- My wife walked into the bedroom to find me pulling off my boxers.
- She told me I spoil the dogs too much.

Time for Joke:
- I hate spelling errors
- You mix up two letters and your whole one liner is urined.

Time for Joke:
- What is the difference between a Policeman's baton and a magician's wand?
- One is for cunning stunts and the other is for stunning...........

Time for Joke:
- I used to live with a closet-gay roommate.
- Then one day I unlocked his chains and he ran away.

Time for Joke:
- How did the Jamaican burn his dick?
- Jerking it.

Time for Joke:
- What product do Jewish boys use most of their money on?
- Lotion

Time for Joke:
- What do you call Donald Trump’s form of currency?
- Trump change

Time for Joke:
- When I was in high school, my dad f*cked my teacher repeatedly for better grades in my math class.
- Thank god im homeschooled or that could have been wierd

Time for Joke:
- I used to sell security alarms door to door, and i was really good at it.
- If no one was home, i would just leave a brochure on the kitchen table.

Time for Joke:
- I just read that 6.7% of the world's population have a problem with alcohol.
- And I thought "6.7%...That would be a pretty strong beer."

Time for Joke:
- Im from colombia and if i got a dollar everytime someone asked me if i sell cocaine.
- I would not have to sell cocaine anymore.

Time for Joke:
- What's the best way to deal with spiders in your office?
- Hire them for web development.

Time for Joke:
- You burn 26 calories a minute kissing.
- That's probably why I'm overweight.

Time for Joke:
- People ask me why I quit my job at the necular power plant
- I guess it was the toxic work environment

Time for Joke:
- If robert frost was bisexual...
- He would have gone both ways.

Time for Joke:
- My customers don’t appreciate how high quality the manure I sell them is.
- I don’t get paid enough for this shit.

Time for Joke:
- A giraffe walks into a bar
- Giraffes aren’t good at playing limbo

Time for Joke:
- There were two sausages in a frying pan...
- One said to the other, "Damn, it's hot in here!"Other one said, "Fuck me, it's a talking sausage!"

Time for Joke:
- How do you track Will Smith in the woods?
- You use fresh prints.

Time for Joke:
- I read that the three most popular Halloween costumes this year are clown, pumpkin, and dinosaur.
- I'm capitalizing on this trend by selling costumes of Trump.

Time for Joke:
- The young assistant got fired from the butchers shop, I asked why.....
- The butcher replied “I caught him with his dick in the bacon slicer!” “Oh!” I replied, “what did you do with the bacon slicer?” “I fired her as well!” said the Butcher.