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Alan Cerny

@alancerny.bsky.social

Writer - @vitalthrills.com and thecryingdad.com, co-host of the @matineeheroes.bsky.social podcast, and Rotten Tomatoes credited reviewer. Steven Spielberg biased. All posts earnest with a hint of sarcasm. My feed, my rules. He/him.

12,344 Followers  |  1,116 Following  |  7,530 Posts  |  Joined: 20.05.2023  |  1.5798

Latest posts by alancerny.bsky.social on Bluesky

Watched THE TERMINATOR, been a few years. James Cameron always was a master of pacing and raising stakes. While he still can, I miss the punk rock director who made this. You can’t be a punk forever, just not how it works. Everyone puts on the suit eventually. It’s all in how you wear it.

08.12.2025 03:32 β€” πŸ‘ 8    πŸ” 1    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 0

Movie theaters forever.

08.12.2025 00:32 β€” πŸ‘ 21    πŸ” 4    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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a man and a woman are dancing in front of a sign that says " oh woah " Alt: a man and a woman are dancing in front of a sign that says " oh woah "

Christmas time. Watching ANNA AND THE APOCALYPSE.

08.12.2025 00:00 β€” πŸ‘ 14    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 3    πŸ“Œ 0

I’m not sure.

07.12.2025 23:19 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

I will say that whenever Shakespeare left Agnes with the kids to go do his plays I imagined he was saying, β€œLady, you’re just too much drama for me. I’m going to go to London and boink Gwyneth Paltrow.”

07.12.2025 21:57 β€” πŸ‘ 4    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0

HAMNET: I see why some critics don’t like this one. It’s a build-up to the last 30 minutes which are incredibly emotional. It skirts the line of being over-the-top and it’s a fragile balance. Buckley, Mescal, and especially Jacobi Jupe are remarkable; Jupe gives an all-timer child performance.

07.12.2025 21:38 β€” πŸ‘ 12    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 4    πŸ“Œ 0

Utter masterpiece.

07.12.2025 05:54 β€” πŸ‘ 3    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

KILL BILL: THE WHOLE BLOODY AFFAIR - at the time I liked the reveal at the end of Part 1. But I have to admit that the movie plays so much better when we don’t know BB’s still alive. When the Bride finds out, it’s devastating to us as well.

How Uma Thurman didn’t get an Oscar I’ll never understand.

07.12.2025 05:52 β€” πŸ‘ 28    πŸ” 1    πŸ’¬ 3    πŸ“Œ 0

Mostly I just miss that time. It really felt like a shared community of cool. I can’t dispel that.

07.12.2025 03:26 β€” πŸ‘ 12    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 0

Intermission at KILL BILL: THE WHOLE BLOODY AFFAIR. It rules so hard. I’m feeling a deep nostalgia for that time in my life, with my AICN friends, how it felt like the world was making art for us alone, and I miss that time, even though I am happy the world changed for the better. It’s complicated.

07.12.2025 03:24 β€” πŸ‘ 58    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 0

Matthew Lillard story: He directed a movie called FAT KID RULES THE WORLD (if you find the DVD I’m quoted on it!), a fantastic coming-of-age movie I saw at SXSW. Adored it, and I told him so at the Q&A. He smiled so wide. β€œI love you, dude.” Felt great. Great guy.

QT says stupid shit. Always has.

07.12.2025 00:07 β€” πŸ‘ 232    πŸ” 6    πŸ’¬ 5    πŸ“Œ 2
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a silhouette of two people dancing in front of a red backdrop Alt: a silhouette of two people dancing in front of a red backdrop

Tonight - KILL BILL: THE WHOLE BLOODY AFFAIR.

QT may say dumb shit, but he’s been saying dumb shit since PULP FICTION.

Know what else he’s been doing for decades? Oh yeah, MAKING BANGER MOVIES.

06.12.2025 23:56 β€” πŸ‘ 13    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0

When we talk about physical media, we are often only taking about personal collections but a big part of shunning the current digital ecosystem is supporting your local library. Not just for print books and periodicals but for movies, games and other medias too. Get. A. Library. Card.

06.12.2025 21:12 β€” πŸ‘ 544    πŸ” 209    πŸ’¬ 11    πŸ“Œ 14

More like WHITE HOUSE DOWN, heh

06.12.2025 20:17 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Casablanca Down

06.12.2025 20:15 β€” πŸ‘ 10    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 0

Casa Wars: The Empire Strikes Blanca

06.12.2025 20:13 β€” πŸ‘ 3    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

2 Casa 2 Blanca

06.12.2025 20:12 β€” πŸ‘ 9    πŸ” 3    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 3

CasabIIanca

06.12.2025 20:10 β€” πŸ‘ 5    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

KILLED IT

06.12.2025 19:49 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

The irony is The Landlord's Game was created by Lizzie Magie specifically to show the evils of real estate and property ownership. Charles Darrow stole it and sold it to Parker Bros, both cutting Magie out and proving her fucking point.

06.12.2025 19:46 β€” πŸ‘ 5    πŸ” 1    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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a person is playing a monopoly game with money and cards Alt: a person is playing a monopoly game with money and cards

The problem is Parker Brothers made a game that showed us the horrors of unrestricted capitalism and the people who played it celebrated crushing everyone else in the room. Biggest β€œWait, not like that” in history.

06.12.2025 19:42 β€” πŸ‘ 11    πŸ” 2    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 1
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Felt a lot of love tonight. Forever thankful.

MAKE MOVIES WITH FRIENDS

06.12.2025 08:24 β€” πŸ‘ 24    πŸ” 3    πŸ’¬ 3    πŸ“Œ 0
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a man and woman singing on a stage with a band in the background Alt: a man and woman singing on a stage with a band in the background

SONG SUNG BLUE: Your mom’s going to love it. Bring tissues. I liked it!

06.12.2025 17:43 β€” πŸ‘ 6    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Houston! I have your Sunday evening plans set- come hang with me at the River Oaks Theater for a screening of THE RULES OF ATTRACTION.

I'll be moderating a Q&A with actor Shannyn Sossamon!

06.12.2025 00:44 β€” πŸ‘ 24    πŸ” 8    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 1

Sing β€œCome On Up To The House” and make the most of it.

06.12.2025 00:01 β€” πŸ‘ 6    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

They emphasized that it’s before A NEW HOPE was added. I’m hopeful.

05.12.2025 23:38 β€” πŸ‘ 13    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0

www.starwars.com/news/star-wa...

05.12.2025 23:24 β€” πŸ‘ 6    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 0

I genuinely thought the original 1977 version of STAR WARS would never return. I’ll take the good news as it comes.

05.12.2025 22:59 β€” πŸ‘ 428    πŸ” 27    πŸ’¬ 4    πŸ“Œ 4

Exciting news in an otherwise shit time. www.starwars.com/news/star-wa...

05.12.2025 22:53 β€” πŸ‘ 8    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
05.12.2025 22:27 β€” πŸ‘ 4    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

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