Big Bird

please tell me this legendary chatter was hailed as a conquering hero upon their return

I can't put into words the feeling of watching our government, a hive of evil antisocial filth, the absolute worst humanity has to offer, colliding with the best. Ordinary people trying to help each other, risking everything to stand up for what's plainly, unambiguously fair and right. It's unreal

he looks like you tried to describe James from Twin Peaks to someone by memory

for me, it's "throw a silver dollar and a lady gets hurt!"

FUCK SCOTT ADAMS

the steelers have finished 10-10-1 and host the london monarchs in the first round of the playoffs. they do not put up much of a fight as london wins 34-7 but mike tomlin's non-losing-record streak is alive. the year is 2072 he is one hundred years old

ok here is a different distraction

this regular season, the Eagles had 12 drives in the fourth quarter or overtime where they were down by one score or tied.

the results:
5 punts
3 turnovers on downs
1 pick
1 fumble
1 clock expiration
1 field goal

I, Big Bird, am now quite certain that the crimes of this guilty land will never be purged away but with blood. I had, as I now think, vainly flattered myself that without very much bloodshed it might be done.

this is your mission. roll up to this daycare in full tactical gear to harass some kids and teachers. when you get spooked by your own shadow like a panicked horse and start shooting your gun, our pedophile president will call the person you shot a terrorist. good luck soldier

the jim harbaugh situation has become untenable

every NYT headline is like…They expected pee: poo greeted them instead

you guys ever think about how twenty years ago our dumbest president declared real life shooting war on the abstract concept of fear and that’s just how the country has conducted itself ever since

I keep seeing regular Americans taking more risks every day to fight tyranny, want, and cynicism than I see from the opposition party, and I imagine many of those regular Americans are asking themselves what the value proposition of such an opposition party is, really

one step closer to telling my boss that i can't ask AI to write emails for me on religious grounds

people will continue to doubt him in big games until he gives them a reason not to. not saying this is right or wrong, just seems to be the consensus at the moment

not espn glazing sanders for beating the fucking raiders ICANT

The opioid crisis the Sackler family intentionally began costs the United States roughly $4 trillion a year.

draymond retire unc wemby owns you 🤏

tar and feather kevin patullo do not pass go do not collect $200

this just in: football is a team sport

seahawks fans forgetting that sam darnold existed last year is so fucking funny. yep, he is an extremely efficient passer through ten weeks. what did he do in the playoffs? not important lmao

They're going to change the clocks this weekend and the president is powerless to stop it. Because he's weak and a loser. That's what they're saying sir

sorry i'm late but once again national tight ends day is not real and cannot hurt you

can’t take this one away from him though

they are so close to understanding the entire point of trade

i'm normally not one to defend jerry jones but i give people the middle finger when i mean to give em the thumbs up all the time. gotta be at least a few times a week i be doin that

if you work for ICE you’re evil. if you cheer ICE on, you’re evil. ICE has no positive value in this country. it’s just an outlet for people’s worst, most racist and violent impulses.

we're not making it out of south america with this one

chris jones being such a bitch that he longs for the beating he took last february in the owl LMAOOOOOO