a woman helps an elderly woman with a walker with a sign that says sure grandma let 's get you to bed ALT: a woman helps an elderly woman with a walker with a sign that says sure grandma let 's get you to bed

The fireflies are dying and no grandkid is gonna believe we used to have bugs with lights on their asses just flying around during the summertime.

The thing about left-right unrest in the US is that while right wingers have a lot of people willing to do violence, and able to do it, they don’t have that many willing to suffer violence

Remind your friends that they don’t have to open the door. 💞 #DSM #Iowa

Curd-side pick up with @culvers.com

The stuffed animal hammock collapsed, but look at the one hanging on strong… 🍉

Spent far too much time wondering which fish in Shark TALE had the last name Grenier

A neighbor kid showed me their dream wedding playlist and the first two songs?
- My Shot (Hamilton)
- Ruff Riders Anthem (DMX)

TAKE ME TO THERE

This is Samson. He thought he was getting a simple piece of cheese. And then discovered the miracle that is mozzarella sticks. 13/10

Izzy and Lizzie, making biscuits

@god.bsky.social since you’re reading these can you grant me $1,000,000? I prayed for it

Me without a crush: what is the point of living?

Me with a crush: God, just shoot me this is cringey

a person wearing a blue hat and glasses stands in front of a sign that says mah hah ALT: a person wearing a blue hat and glasses stands in front of a sign that says mah hah

MAHA— Make America Healthy Again. Amanda did it first

Sorry I’m busy all day, I have a phone call scheduled at 4pm.

Elon should volunteer to go first and then just stay there

a cartoon dog is sitting at a table with a cup of coffee surrounded by fire . ALT: a cartoon dog is sitting at a table with a cup of coffee surrounded by fire .

The people of LA still being forced to work rn

I'm back to work and I've got to be honest....not liking it 😂

‪To the people next to me in Target: Episcopalian isn’t “that thing when you only eat fish” but you were SO CLOSE. ‬

In 2025 we should all collectively agree to stop separating our laundry.

Happy New Year my pants ripped up the back as I was leaving work today.

2025.

When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be.

Turns out, identity theft is a crime.

Luigi gets hotter every time they parade him around

I think parental controls should also apply to our parents… my mom has 2 Spotify accounts and didn’t know because she can’t ever remember passwords

Ah, my favourite part of YOU'VE GOT MAIL when her privately-run bookstore is crushed and she bonds with her capitalist oppressor.

If you are a rich guy I’m stupid shit and you should spend your money on me

A poem for my mother on Thanksgiving

This is just to say
I have eaten
the French’s®️ Crispy Fried Onions
that were in
the cupboard

and which
you were probably
saving
for Thanksgiving

Forgive me
they were delicious
so salty
and so crunchy

They give you some focaccia to dip in it. OH! If you can get down there for lunch South Union does a delicious Potato Pepperjack. Realize none of these are recipes 😂😂 just recommendations

I don’t make it, but the Gateway Tortilla soup?? 😍😍 been trying for years to recreate it at home