alison

I didn’t realize how broken Twitter was until I realized this is the first “tweet” I’ve seen of yours in like 10 years lmao

Had a tough homework day with the eight-year-old, tears were shed and tempers flared, but then he bounced back and spent our spaghetti dinner speaking with a hilarious Italian accent. Some lows, but they always come between the highest highs ♥️

I have three gray hairs at the front of my head and I know they are absolutely from this past month alone. With that being said, lots of happy, fulfilling life changes over here ♥️

Lolol wondering if I’ll have better luck on Twitter finding actual when we were young tickets 🥲

I’ve lost the last two games of NYT Connections and I think the failure is changing my DNA…………..how fucking lame would it be if NYT connections was my villain origin story 🥲

saw the postal service (and jenny lewis!!!) for the first time since 2013 so I’m going to go into hibernation until they tour again in 2033 😭

Just had a dream (nightmare?) that all the toilet paper in my office building was tea-colored and crunchy. 😵‍💫 Also, I work from home?? Whose office was that, Miss Brain??

Shoutout to the asshole mosquitos who bit up my legs at Disneyland yesterday. Hope y’all get flushed down a toilet

At a Korean restaurant that ran out of RICE…. I’m…. I’m so sad

That’s a badge of honor lmao

Just going to sit here with my arms crossed until the Beyonce/Megan concert video comes out 😭😡

SAW THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND TONIGHT

this is the picture my dad sent to let me know I forgot my bag at my parents’ house 🥲

apple really showed hole

We’ve watched The Exorcist, Poltergeist, and The Haunting, couldn’t get through Vampyre, Dr. Caligari, and some other fucked up oldies, and finish every night with a Treehouse of Horror episode 👻

Bry and I have been watching all the horror classics we watched as kids and WOW, a lot of these are so genuinely good, but way more fucked up than I remember?? Where was the parental guidance lmaooo

just came up with like an evil, fucked up ratatouille who pulls your hair to make you be rude and mean. like remy’s wario. watatouille.

I WANT THE MESS

I like this app so far, but I need to see more trash tbh

Happy birthday to Beyonce!!! Only Bey has a birthday this year!!!!!!!

I haven’t found the shit side of Bluesky so this site feels a lot like early 00’s blogs. Like everybody seems like they Bluesky while wearing a baby soft shawl and holding a glass of dry ass wine

Bottoms was the most absurd, hilarious, girlypop movie — I LOVED IT SO MUCH. And the climactic needledrop was unmatched 🥲

ok, but where’s BEYONCE