When you can snatch the pebble from my hand - *student snatches pebble* then you will be cursed, because it is a cursed pebble. Dumbass. Its rude to interrupt.
[Meteor hit] Captain, shields are at 80085 percent! Lmao just kidding we don't have any fucking shields on this ship
If I ever get double skunked I want you to take the shot. Look at the cut, Lennie! That's 2 for the jack Lennie.
I Sold my Soul to the Devil and All I Got was to be Peter Criss
The Assassination of Goofus by the Coward Gallant
Man dem wickid
Come for the light at the end of the birth canal, stay for the weather
Every spring my people make effigies of Goofus and stop them to death beneath bare bleeding feet
Gallant enjoys appropriate and healthy relationships with the people in his household.
Goofus gets apprehended by a state agency for his welfare
What's everyone doing for LaTeX on windows these days. Been out of the game
Everytime you crack open an import beer it should play the Counter-Strike "Terrorists Win!" soundclip
Bram Stoker's Ruth's Chris Steakhouse
Well it's like they say: if you aren't a wasteland raider in your 20s you have no spirit, if you're still a wasteland raider in your 30s you aren't a very good raider
Batman spent a decade with the league of shadows learning how to do this and then he picked up all the karate and shit in the last week
Spider snared me in her web once and there was like a long contemplative break and then a little while later I saw her building a new web on the other side of the rose bush
Never in the same place twice - habits are for nuns
Me: what the fu-
The company: it was 13:00 on September 14
Me: ah, say no more
Internet recipe writers have a paranoid obsession with "gluey" mashed potatoes - a thing which in over a decade of making mashed potatoes several tines a week I don't think I have ever once experienced
Ants are the only other species known to have developed porno
I launched a spinning back-kick in 2023 and at this point I'm starting to get irrevocably dizzy
February black berries. President Sheinbaum, I am standing by
First guy to figure out you could make a noise by blowing through an animal's horn was probably on some freak shit
It's going to be a bad autumn to be an apple
Vizier: Dire news, Your Grace. It's humpty dumpty. He's.. had a great fall. He's cracked, Your Grace
King: No matter. Simply have all of my horses and all of my men attend to him
Vizier, tears in his eyes:
Merry: the closer we are to danger -
Pippin: - the farther we are from harm!
Treebeard: oh my god shut up, just shut the fuck up! You've been talking all day. Nobody wants to hear it. We don't care what you have to say, just stop fucking talking!
It's the cinema experience that has critics saying "I don't know"!
"I overslept and missed it" - Dolly Rigg, The Times
"My car was in the shop" - Cam Era, The Globe
"Doctors say I had a transient 108 minute amnesia event. They've never seen anything like it" - Erik 'Dutch' Angle, The Tribune
Don't call me bro unless we share a mother. Or we've shook hands, or been in the hardware store at the same time, or we're wearing the same jeans. Or if you think my eyes are pretty
