a guy you know

Everyone in the Epstein emails is making a pubic statement like, “You have to understand: at the time, nobody CARED that he was raping girls!”

Really not prepared for the number of times the Crying Dawson gif is about to be used

You Are Not Prepared for What Actually Shut Down the El Paso Airport This Morning, But Let's Just Say It Involves a Military Mega-Laser Shooting Something Down Did the FAA announce an unprecedented 10-day shutdown of an international airport because of the Pentagon's experimental laser weapon?

There is an entire baggage claim worth of stuff to unpack here

so uuuuuhh you figure anything out yet or

(nodding)

A male Anna’s hummingbird at the door. So nosy! 🤣

Earlier today, I was notified that someone was at my door.

This is who it was:

For real.

This is next level detached from reality

Like I seriously believe these people think they can do life like a damn Call of Duty level, I think that is what they are actually expecting

unacceptably low number of likes on this

they've dragged this snowman horror from the sea

now we feed it to the seagull dogs

yep it's a Malort advent calendar alright

"Malort advent calendar" is already such an unhinged concept but every little window just having Malort in it really pushes it over the edge into something transcendently funny

Trump Still Polling Well With Working-Class American Pedophiles

Trump Still Polling Well With Working-Class American Pedophiles https://theonion.com/trump-still-polling-well-with-working-class-american-pedophiles/

I love how every dude who can grow a decent beard immediately clocked what was going on here, it does my heart good

That's totally it, he's still saved in some dudes' phones as "Patches the Clown"

my god, did that smell good

YouTube video by AustinCityLimitsTV Lyle Lovett & His Large Band on Austin City Limits "Pants Is Overrated"

@drpantsmusic.bsky.social Just now learned of this broadside from @lylelovett.bsky.social a couple of years ago

devastated by this creative rift

www.youtube.com/watch?v=tPtA...

If you are a journalist — or know one — who has been attacked, seriously threatened, denied access by a public official or targeted with a legal order in the course of reporting, let us know. You can now submit tips in English or Spanish. Email: tips@pressfreedomtracker.us

If you are a journalist — or know one — who has been attacked, seriously threatened, denied access by a public official or targeted with a legal order in the course of reporting, let us know. You can now submit tips in English or Spanish.

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holy shit

Hey I got this too sometimes, and I found a setting that keeps the viewport basically static but lets you move the power wash handle around within it (instead of the camera moving every time you move the power washer) and it was incredibly helpful. ymmv of course

Report Finds Majority Of Fumbles Recovered Within First 48 Hours

Report Finds Majority Of Fumbles Recovered Within First 48 Hours http://theonion.com/report-finds-majority-of-fumbles-recovered-within-first-48-hours/

It all started when my well-off parents died and left me just over a million dollars

Obsessed with the absolute shade of referring to Giuliani as “Former Masked Singer contestant”

Mercury-A — Entry — Ishtar Collective [REDACTED]

@mynameisbyf.bsky.social so I know there's probably not enough material for an entire video but boy would I like to hear more about how Lodi also knows Saint from pre-collapse times

Lodi's super power is that he knows everybody from Work
www.ishtar-collective.net/entries/merc...

so help me god I will find the man who shit my pants

Pilot over the intercom: uhhhhhhh we are all just flesh. We exist so briefly.

Beautifully executed rough chuckles

so this is not Joe Walsh from the Eagles, is what I'm picking up

"See, Elon? You don't need drugs to be a bad person! You can be a monster all on your own!"

google ai answer to "has the Pope got better" Yes, Pope Francis is showing signs of improvement. While his doctors still have a cautious prognosis, he has made progress in his respiratory function, mobility, and voice. He is also no longer considered to be in imminent danger of death.

good news everyone